1 00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:47,959 Shrek 2001 English 2 00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:52,839 [ MAN ] Once upon a time there was a lovely princess. 3 00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:56,679 But she had an enchantment upon her of a fearful sort... 4 00:00:56,760 --> 00:01:01,639 which could only be broken by love's first kiss. 5 00:01:01,720 --> 00:01:04,059 She was locked away in a castle... 6 00:01:04,140 --> 00:01:08,359 guarded by a terrible fire-breathing dragon. 7 00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:12,819 Many brave knights had attempted to free her from this dreadful prison, 8 00:01:12,900 --> 00:01:15,649 but none prevailed. 9 00:01:15,740 --> 00:01:17,909 She waited in the dragon's keep... 10 00:01:17,990 --> 00:01:20,909 in the highest room of the tallest tower... 11 00:01:20,990 --> 00:01:25,539 for her true love and true love's first kiss. 12 00:01:25,620 --> 00:01:28,579 [ LAUGHING ] Like that's ever gonna happen. 13 00:01:28,670 --> 00:01:32,419 - [ PAPER RUSTLING, TOILET FLUSHES ] - What a load of... 14 00:01:32,500 --> 00:01:37,089 ♪ Somebody once told me ♪ ♪ the world is gonna roll me ♪ 15 00:01:37,180 --> 00:01:41,139 ♪ I am not the sharpest tool ♪ ♪ in the shed ♪ 16 00:01:41,220 --> 00:01:46,139 ♪ She was looking kind of dumb ♪ ♪ with her finger and her thumb ♪ 17 00:01:46,230 --> 00:01:49,939 ♪ In the shape of an L ♪ ♪ on her forehead ♪ 18 00:01:50,020 --> 00:01:52,939 ♪ The years start coming ♪ ♪ and they don't stop coming ♪ 19 00:01:53,030 --> 00:01:55,859 ♪ Fed to the rules ♪ ♪ and I hit the ground running ♪ 20 00:01:55,940 --> 00:01:58,199 ♪ Didn't make sense ♪ ♪ not to live for fun ♪ 21 00:01:58,280 --> 00:02:00,489 ♪ Your brain gets smart ♪ ♪ but your head gets dumb ♪ 22 00:02:00,570 --> 00:02:02,489 ♪ So much to do ♪ ♪ So much to see ♪ 23 00:02:02,580 --> 00:02:05,159 ♪ So what's wrong with ♪ ♪ taking the back streets ♪ 24 00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:07,289 ♪ You'll never know ♪ ♪ if you don't go ♪ 25 00:02:07,370 --> 00:02:09,829 ♪ You'll never shine ♪ ♪ if you don't glow ♪ 26 00:02:09,920 --> 00:02:11,839 ♪ Hey, now ♪ ♪ You're an all-star ♪ 27 00:02:11,920 --> 00:02:14,299 ♪ Get your game on, go play ♪ 28 00:02:14,380 --> 00:02:18,299 ♪ Hey, now, you're a rock star ♪ ♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪ 29 00:02:18,380 --> 00:02:22,349 ♪ And all that ♪ ♪ glitters is gold ♪ 30 00:02:22,430 --> 00:02:27,849 ♪ Only shooting stars ♪ ♪ break the mould ♪ 31 00:02:27,940 --> 00:02:30,020 ♪ It's a cool place ♪ ♪ and they say it gets colder ♪ 32 00:02:30,099 --> 00:02:32,339 ♪ You're bundled up now ♪ ♪ but wait till you get older ♪ 33 00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:34,399 ♪ But the meteor men ♪ ♪ beg to differ ♪ 34 00:02:34,479 --> 00:02:36,519 ♪ Judging by the hole ♪ ♪ in the satellite picture ♪ 35 00:02:36,540 --> 00:02:39,199 ♪ The ice we skate ♪ ♪ is getting pretty thin ♪ 36 00:02:39,278 --> 00:02:41,559 ♪ The water's getting warm ♪ ♪ so you might as well swim ♪ 37 00:02:41,580 --> 00:02:43,239 ♪ My world's on fire ♪ ♪ How 'bout yours ♪ 38 00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:45,989 ♪ That's the way I like it ♪ ♪ and I'll never get bored ♪ 39 00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:48,709 ♪ - Hey, now, you're an all-star ♪ ♪ - [ SHOUTING ] ♪ 40 00:02:48,790 --> 00:02:52,379 ♪ Get your game on, go play ♪ 41 00:02:52,460 --> 00:02:55,589 ♪ Hey, now, you're a rock star ♪ ♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪ 42 00:02:55,670 --> 00:02:59,379 ♪ And all that ♪ ♪ glitters is gold ♪ 43 00:02:59,470 --> 00:03:04,389 ♪ Only shooting stars ♪ ♪ break the mould ♪ 44 00:03:04,470 --> 00:03:07,019 [ BELCHES ] 45 00:03:08,310 --> 00:03:10,229 - Go! - Go! 46 00:03:10,310 --> 00:03:13,439 - [ RECORD SCRATCHING ] - Go. Go. Go. 47 00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:16,069 ♪ Hey, now ♪ ♪ You're an all-star ♪ 48 00:03:16,150 --> 00:03:19,239 ♪ Get your game on, go play ♪ 49 00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:23,569 ♪ Hey, now, you're a rock star ♪ ♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪ 50 00:03:23,660 --> 00:03:27,539 ♪ And all that ♪ ♪ glitters is gold ♪ 51 00:03:27,620 --> 00:03:32,919 ♪ Only shooting stars ♪ ♪ break the mould ♪ 52 00:03:37,630 --> 00:03:40,879 - Think it's in there? - AI right. Let's get it! 53 00:03:40,970 --> 00:03:43,719 Whoa. Ho Id on. Do you know what that thing can do to you? 54 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:46,759 Yeah, it'll grind your bones for its bread. 55 00:03:46,850 --> 00:03:50,809 [ LAUGHS ] Yes, well, actually, that would be a giant. 56 00:03:50,890 --> 00:03:54,939 Now, ogres... They're much worse. 57 00:03:55,020 --> 00:03:57,939 They'll make a suit from your freshly peeled skin. 58 00:03:58,030 --> 00:04:00,109 - No! - They'll shave your liver. 59 00:04:00,190 --> 00:04:03,449 Squeeze the jelly from your eyes! 60 00:04:03,530 --> 00:04:06,069 - Actually, it's quite good on toast. - Back! Back, beast! 61 00:04:06,160 --> 00:04:08,289 Back! I warn ta! 62 00:04:11,210 --> 00:04:14,579 - [ GASPING ] - Right. 63 00:04:14,670 --> 00:04:17,419 [ ROARING ] 64 00:04:17,500 --> 00:04:22,259 - [ SHOUTING ] - [ ROARING ] 65 00:04:22,340 --> 00:04:25,679 [ ROARING CONTINUES ] 66 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:29,349 [ SHOUTING CONTINUES ] 67 00:04:29,430 --> 00:04:33,979 [ WHISPERS ] This is the part where you run away. 68 00:04:34,060 --> 00:04:37,269 - [ GASPING ] - [ LAUGHS ] 69 00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:40,689 [ LAUGHING ] 70 00:04:40,780 --> 00:04:43,819 And stay out! 71 00:04:45,700 --> 00:04:48,779 Wanted. Fairy tale creatures. 72 00:04:50,410 --> 00:04:52,329 [ SIGHS ] 73 00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:56,669 [ MAN'S VOICE ] All right. This one's full. 74 00:04:57,290 --> 00:04:59,379 - Take it away! - [ GASPS ] 75 00:04:59,460 --> 00:05:03,339 - Move it along. Come on! Get up! - Next! 76 00:05:03,420 --> 00:05:06,339 Give me that! Your flying days are over. 77 00:05:06,430 --> 00:05:09,049 That's 20 pieces of silver for the witch. Next! 78 00:05:09,140 --> 00:05:11,849 - Get up! Come on! - Twenty pieces. 79 00:05:11,930 --> 00:05:14,309 - [ THUDDING ] - Sit down there! 80 00:05:14,390 --> 00:05:16,899 - Keep quiet! - [ CRYING ] 81 00:05:16,980 --> 00:05:19,859 This cage is too small. 82 00:05:19,940 --> 00:05:22,060 Please don't turn me in. I'll never be stubborn again. 83 00:05:22,110 --> 00:05:24,109 I can change. Please! Give me another chance! 84 00:05:24,190 --> 00:05:26,569 Oh, shut up. Oh! Next! 85 00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:29,529 - What have you got? - This little wooden puppet. 86 00:05:29,620 --> 00:05:34,539 I'm not a puppet. I'm a real boy. 87 00:05:34,620 --> 00:05:36,999 Five shillings for the possessed toy. 88 00:05:37,039 --> 00:05:39,279 - Take it away. - Father, please! Don't let them do this! 89 00:05:39,300 --> 00:05:41,169 - Help me! - Next. What have you got? 90 00:05:41,250 --> 00:05:43,879 - Well, I've got a talking donkey. - [ GRUNTS ] 91 00:05:43,960 --> 00:05:48,509 Right. Well, that's good for ten shillings, if you can prove it. 92 00:05:48,590 --> 00:05:52,509 Oh, go ahead, little fella. 93 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:54,519 Well? 94 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:57,309 Oh, oh, he's just... He's just a little nervous. 95 00:05:57,390 --> 00:06:01,359 He's really quite a chatterbox. Talk, you bone headed dolt... 96 00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:04,029 - That's it. I've heard enough. Guards! - No, no, he talks! 97 00:06:04,110 --> 00:06:08,239 He does. I can talk. I love to talk. 98 00:06:08,320 --> 00:06:11,239 I'm the talkingest damn thing you ever saw. 99 00:06:11,330 --> 00:06:13,869 - Get her out of my sight. - No, no! 100 00:06:13,950 --> 00:06:18,369 I swear! Oh! He can talk! 101 00:06:18,460 --> 00:06:20,629 [ GASPS ] 102 00:06:20,710 --> 00:06:23,089 Hey! I can fly! 103 00:06:23,170 --> 00:06:24,799 - He can fly! - He can fly! 104 00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:27,929 - He can talk! - Ha, ha! That's right, fool! 105 00:06:28,010 --> 00:06:30,259 Now I'm a flying, talking donkey. 106 00:06:30,340 --> 00:06:32,969 You might have seen a house fly, maybe even a super fly, 107 00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:36,099 but I bet you are not never seen a donkey fly. 108 00:06:36,180 --> 00:06:38,099 Ha, ha! 109 00:06:38,190 --> 00:06:40,099 Uh-oh. 110 00:06:40,190 --> 00:06:42,399 [ GRUNTS ] 111 00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:44,439 Seize him! 112 00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:49,239 After him! He's getting away! 113 00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:56,999 [ GRUNTS, GASPS ] 114 00:06:57,080 --> 00:07:00,289 [ MAN ] Get him! This way! Turn! 115 00:07:05,500 --> 00:07:07,799 You there. Ogre! 116 00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:10,179 Aye? 117 00:07:10,260 --> 00:07:14,349 By the order of Lord Farquaad, I am authorised to place you both under arrest... 118 00:07:14,430 --> 00:07:20,019 and transport you to a designated... resettlement facility. 119 00:07:20,100 --> 00:07:24,149 Oh, really? You and what army? 120 00:07:27,570 --> 00:07:29,149 [ GASPS, WHIMPERING ] 121 00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:31,149 [ CHUCKLES ] 122 00:07:34,910 --> 00:07:36,909 Can I say something to you? 123 00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:40,329 Listen, you was really, really something back there. Incredible! 124 00:07:40,410 --> 00:07:46,169 Are you talking to... me? Whoa! 125 00:07:46,250 --> 00:07:50,219 Yes, I was talking to you. Can I tell you that you was great back there? Those guards! 126 00:07:50,300 --> 00:07:53,009 They thought they was all of that. Then you showed up, and bam! 127 00:07:53,088 --> 00:07:55,369 They was tripping over themselves like babes in the woods. 128 00:07:55,390 --> 00:07:57,059 That really made me feel good to see that. 129 00:07:57,140 --> 00:08:00,179 - Oh, that's great. Really. - Man, it's good to be free. 130 00:08:00,270 --> 00:08:05,809 Now, why don't you go celebrate your freedom with your own friends? Hmm? 131 00:08:05,900 --> 00:08:09,189 But, uh, I don't have any friends. 132 00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:11,949 And I'm not going out there by myself. 133 00:08:12,030 --> 00:08:14,569 Hey, wait a minute! I got a great idea! I'll stick with you. 134 00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:16,579 You're a mean, green, fighting machine. 135 00:08:16,660 --> 00:08:19,060 Together we'll scare the spit out of anybody that crosses us. 136 00:08:20,330 --> 00:08:23,169 [ ROARING ] 137 00:08:23,250 --> 00:08:25,919 Oh, wow! That was really scary. 138 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:29,709 If you don't mind me saying, if that don't work, your breath certainly will get the job done, 139 00:08:29,780 --> 00:08:32,980 'cause you definitely need some Tic Tacs or something, 'cause your breath stinks! 140 00:08:33,010 --> 00:08:36,219 You almost burned the hair outta my nose, 141 00:08:36,300 --> 00:08:39,139 just like the time... [ MUMBLING ] 142 00:08:39,220 --> 00:08:42,939 Then I ate some rotten berries. I had strong gases eking out of my butt that day. 143 00:08:43,020 --> 00:08:45,729 Why are you following me? 144 00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:49,399 I'll tell you why. 145 00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:52,399 ♪ 'Cause I'm all alone ♪ 146 00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:56,239 ♪ There's no one here ♪ ♪ beside me ♪ 147 00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:59,989 ♪ My problems ♪ ♪ have all gone ♪ 148 00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:03,409 ♪ There's no one ♪ ♪ to deride me ♪ 149 00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:05,459 ♪ But you gotta have friends... ♪ 150 00:09:05,540 --> 00:09:08,589 Stop singing! 151 00:09:08,670 --> 00:09:10,709 It's no wonder you don't have any friends. 152 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:14,419 Wow. Only a true friend would be that truly honest. 153 00:09:14,510 --> 00:09:18,599 Listen, little donkey. Take a look at me. What am I? 154 00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:21,599 Uh... 155 00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:26,729 - Really tall? - No! I'm an ogre. 156 00:09:26,810 --> 00:09:30,019 You know. Grab your torch and pitchforks. 157 00:09:30,110 --> 00:09:32,109 Doesn't that bother you? 158 00:09:32,190 --> 00:09:34,319 Nope. 159 00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:37,279 - Really? - Really, really. 160 00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:40,489 - Oh. - Man, I like you. What's your name? 161 00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:44,249 Uh, Shrek. 162 00:09:44,330 --> 00:09:47,579 Shrek? Well, you know what I like about you, Shrek? 163 00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:51,709 You got that kind of I-don't-care-what-nobody- thinks-of-me thing. 164 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:55,589 I like that. I respect that, Shrek. You all right. 165 00:09:55,670 --> 00:09:59,679 Whoo! Look at that. Who'd want to live in a place like that? 166 00:09:59,760 --> 00:10:02,969 That would be my home. 167 00:10:03,060 --> 00:10:05,929 Oh! And it is lovely! Just beautiful. 168 00:10:06,020 --> 00:10:09,809 You are quite a decorator. It's amazing what you've done with such a modest budget. 169 00:10:09,900 --> 00:10:14,649 I like that boulder. That is a nice boulder. 170 00:10:18,410 --> 00:10:21,119 I guess you don't entertain much, do you? 171 00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:22,989 I like my privacy. 172 00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:25,659 You know, I do too. That's another thing we have in common. 173 00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,999 Like, I hate it when you got somebody in your face. 174 00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:31,999 You're trying to give them a hint, and they won't leave. There's that awkward silence. 175 00:10:35,130 --> 00:10:37,839 - Can I stay with you? - Uh, what? 176 00:10:37,930 --> 00:10:40,509 Can I stay with you, please? 177 00:10:40,590 --> 00:10:42,889 - Of course! - Really? 178 00:10:42,970 --> 00:10:45,349 - No. - Please! I don't wanna go back there! 179 00:10:45,430 --> 00:10:49,349 You don't know what it's like to be considered a freak. Well, maybe you do. 180 00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:52,019 But that's why we gotta stick together. You gotta let me stay! 181 00:10:52,110 --> 00:10:55,229 - Please! Please! - Okay! Okay! 182 00:10:55,320 --> 00:10:57,899 - But one night only. - Ah! Thank you! 183 00:10:57,990 --> 00:11:00,319 - What are you... No! No! - This is gonna be fun! 184 00:11:00,410 --> 00:11:02,319 We can stay up late, swapping manly stories, 185 00:11:02,410 --> 00:11:05,199 and in the morning I'm making waffles. 186 00:11:05,290 --> 00:11:08,539 - Oh! - Where do, uh, I sleep? 187 00:11:08,620 --> 00:11:10,369 Outside! 188 00:11:10,460 --> 00:11:13,539 Oh, well, I guess that's cool. 189 00:11:13,630 --> 00:11:15,709 I mean, I don't know you, and you don't know me, 190 00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:18,169 so I guess outside is best, you know. 191 00:11:18,260 --> 00:11:21,259 [ SNIFFLES ] Here I go. 192 00:11:23,430 --> 00:11:27,519 Good night. [ SIGHS ] 193 00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:31,599 I mean, I do like the outdoors. I'm a donkey. I was born outside. 194 00:11:31,690 --> 00:11:34,359 I'll just be sitting by myself outside, I guess, you know. 195 00:11:34,440 --> 00:11:36,729 By myself, outside. 196 00:11:36,820 --> 00:11:41,609 ♪ I'm all alone ♪ ♪ There's no one here beside me ♪ 197 00:11:41,700 --> 00:11:43,029 [ BUBBLING ] 198 00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:03,259 [ SIGHS ] 199 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:45,799 [ CREAKING ] 200 00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:48,509 [ SIGHS ] I thought I told you to stay outside. 201 00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:52,269 - I am outside. - [ CLATTERING ] 202 00:12:52,350 --> 00:12:54,099 [ CLATTERING ] 203 00:12:57,770 --> 00:13:01,569 Well, gents, it's a far cry from the farm, but what choice do we have? 204 00:13:01,650 --> 00:13:04,149 It's not home, but it'll do just fine. 205 00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:06,159 What a lovely bed. 206 00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:08,579 - Got ta. - [ SNIFFS ] I found some cheese. 207 00:13:08,660 --> 00:13:11,159 - Ow! [ GRUNTS ] - Blah! Awful stuff. 208 00:13:12,910 --> 00:13:15,499 - Is that you, Gorder? - How did you know? 209 00:13:15,580 --> 00:13:18,499 Enough! What are you doing in my house? 210 00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:20,499 [ GRUNTS ] Hey! 211 00:13:20,590 --> 00:13:23,219 - [ SNICKERS ] - Oh, no, no, no. 212 00:13:23,300 --> 00:13:26,889 - Dead broad off the table. - Where are we supposed to put her? The bed's taken. 213 00:13:26,970 --> 00:13:30,139 Huh? [ GASPS ] 214 00:13:30,220 --> 00:13:32,849 [ MALE VOICE ] What? 215 00:13:32,930 --> 00:13:37,689 I live in a swamp. I put up signs. I'm a terrifying ogre! 216 00:13:37,770 --> 00:13:40,399 What do I have to do to get a little privacy? 217 00:13:40,480 --> 00:13:42,899 - Aah! - Oh, no. 218 00:13:42,990 --> 00:13:45,699 Oh, no. 219 00:13:45,780 --> 00:13:49,369 - No! No! - [ CACKLING ] 220 00:13:49,450 --> 00:13:52,369 - [ CACKLING CONTINUES ] - What? 221 00:13:52,450 --> 00:13:54,369 - Quit it. - Don't push. 222 00:13:54,450 --> 00:13:58,709 - [ SQUEAKING ] - [ LOWS ] 223 00:13:58,790 --> 00:14:01,709 What are you doing in my swamp? 224 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:04,209 [ ECHOING ] Swamp! Swamp! Swamp! 225 00:14:04,300 --> 00:14:07,509 - [ GASPING ] - Oh, dear! 226 00:14:07,590 --> 00:14:09,219 Whoa! 227 00:14:09,300 --> 00:14:12,679 All right, get out of here. All of you, move it! 228 00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:15,179 Come on! Let's go! Hapaya! Hapaya! Hey! 229 00:14:15,270 --> 00:14:17,229 - Quickly. Come on! - No, no! 230 00:14:17,310 --> 00:14:19,519 No, no. Not there. Not there. 231 00:14:19,610 --> 00:14:23,109 - Oh! - [ SIGHS ] 232 00:14:23,190 --> 00:14:26,069 Hey, don't look at me. I didn't invite them. 233 00:14:26,150 --> 00:14:28,239 Oh, gosh, no one invited us. 234 00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:30,909 - What? - We were forced to come here. 235 00:14:30,990 --> 00:14:33,119 - By who? - Lord Farquaad. 236 00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:37,959 He huffed und he puffed und he... signed an eviction notice. 237 00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:40,749 [ SIGHS ] All right. 238 00:14:40,830 --> 00:14:45,089 Who knows where this Farquaad guy is? 239 00:14:45,170 --> 00:14:47,969 - [ MURMURING ] - Oh, I do. I know where he is. 240 00:14:48,050 --> 00:14:51,759 Does anyone else know where to find him? 241 00:14:53,220 --> 00:14:55,469 - Any one at all? - Me! Me! 242 00:14:55,560 --> 00:14:57,479 - Anyone? - Oh! Oh, pick me! 243 00:14:57,560 --> 00:14:59,979 Oh, I know! I know! Me, me! 244 00:15:00,060 --> 00:15:03,189 [ SIGHS ] Okay, fine. 245 00:15:03,270 --> 00:15:07,819 Attention, all fairy tale things. 246 00:15:07,900 --> 00:15:12,619 Do not get comfortable. Your welcome is officially worn out. 247 00:15:12,700 --> 00:15:16,409 In fact, I'm gonna see this guy Farquaad right now... 248 00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:19,619 and get you all off my land and back where you came from! 249 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:24,129 [ CHEERING ] 250 00:15:24,210 --> 00:15:27,089 - [ TWITTERING ] - [ CHEERING CONTINUES ] 251 00:15:27,170 --> 00:15:30,129 Oh! You! 252 00:15:30,220 --> 00:15:32,139 You're coming with me. 253 00:15:32,220 --> 00:15:34,559 All right, that's what I like to hear, man. 254 00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:38,429 Shrek and Donkey, two stalwart friends, off on a whirlwind big-city adventure. 255 00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:40,519 I love it! 256 00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:43,769 ♪ - On the road again Sing it ♪ ♪ with me, Shrek. - Hey. Oh, oh! ♪ 257 00:15:43,860 --> 00:15:45,819 ♪ I can't wait to get ♪ ♪ on the road again ♪ 258 00:15:45,900 --> 00:15:47,819 What did I say about singing? 259 00:15:47,900 --> 00:15:49,819 - Can I whistle? - No. 260 00:15:49,900 --> 00:15:52,699 - Can I hum it? - All right, hum it. 261 00:15:52,780 --> 00:15:57,659 ♪ [ HUMMING ] ♪ 262 00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:00,040 [ GRUNTS ] 263 00:16:18,390 --> 00:16:22,389 [ WHIMPERING ] 264 00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:25,519 That's enough. He's ready to talk. 265 00:16:25,610 --> 00:16:29,229 [ COUGHING ] 266 00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:33,239 [ LAUGHING ] 267 00:16:34,910 --> 00:16:36,829 [ CLEARS THROAT ] 268 00:16:38,450 --> 00:16:40,909 Run, run, run, as fast as you can. 269 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:44,539 You can't catch me. I'm the gingerbread man! 270 00:16:44,630 --> 00:16:48,209 - You're a monster. - I'm not the monster here. You are. 271 00:16:48,300 --> 00:16:52,549 You and the rest of that fairy tale trash, poisoning my perfect world. 272 00:16:52,630 --> 00:16:54,549 Now, tell me! Where are the others? 273 00:16:54,640 --> 00:16:57,179 - Eat me! - [ GRUNTS ] 274 00:16:57,260 --> 00:17:00,179 I've tried to be fair to you creatures. 275 00:17:00,270 --> 00:17:03,769 Now my patience has reached its end! Tell me or I'll... 276 00:17:03,850 --> 00:17:06,649 No, no, not the buttons. Not my gumdrop buttons. 277 00:17:06,730 --> 00:17:08,729 All right then. Who's hiding them? 278 00:17:08,820 --> 00:17:14,149 Okay, I'll tell you. Do you know the muffin man? 279 00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:16,569 - The muffin man? - The muffin man. 280 00:17:16,660 --> 00:17:20,079 Yes, I know the muffin man, who lives on Drury Lane? 281 00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:23,579 Well, she's married to the muffin man. 282 00:17:23,660 --> 00:17:25,789 - The muffin man? - The muffin man! 283 00:17:25,870 --> 00:17:28,879 - She's married to the muffin man. - [ DOOR OPENS ] 284 00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:30,629 My Lord! We found it. 285 00:17:30,710 --> 00:17:33,919 Then what are you waiting for? Bring it in. 286 00:17:34,010 --> 00:17:36,299 [ MAN GRUNTING ] 287 00:17:45,310 --> 00:17:47,809 - [ GASPING ] - Oh! 288 00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:52,229 - Magic mirror... - Don't tell him anything! 289 00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:54,649 No! 290 00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:58,489 - [ GINGERBREAD MAN WHIMPERS ] - Evening. 291 00:17:58,570 --> 00:18:00,449 Mirror, mirror, on the wall. 292 00:18:00,530 --> 00:18:03,909 Is this not the most perfect kingdom of them all? 293 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:06,579 Well, technically you're not a king. 294 00:18:06,670 --> 00:18:10,089 Uh, Thelonius. 295 00:18:10,170 --> 00:18:13,799 - You were saying? - What I mean is, you're not a king yet. 296 00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:17,469 But you can become one. All you have to do is marry a princess. 297 00:18:17,550 --> 00:18:20,549 - Go on. - [ CHUCKLES ] 298 00:18:20,640 --> 00:18:24,269 So, just sit back and relax, my Lord, 299 00:18:24,350 --> 00:18:28,649 because it's time for you to meet today's eligible bachelorettes. 300 00:18:28,730 --> 00:18:32,319 And here they are! 301 00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:37,359 Bachelorette number one is a mentally abused shut-in from a kingdom far, faraway. 302 00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:39,699 She likes sushi and hot tubbing anytime. 303 00:18:39,780 --> 00:18:43,239 Her hobbies include cooking and cleaning for her two evil sisters. 304 00:18:43,330 --> 00:18:45,699 Please welcome Cinderella. 305 00:18:45,790 --> 00:18:49,829 Bachelorette number two is a cape-wearing girl from the land of fancy. 306 00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:52,629 Although she lives with seven other men, she's not easy. 307 00:18:52,710 --> 00:18:56,169 Just kiss her dead, frozen lips and find out what a live wire she is. 308 00:18:56,260 --> 00:19:00,009 Come on. Give it up for Snow White! 309 00:19:00,090 --> 00:19:02,719 And last, but certainly not least, 310 00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:04,889 bachelorette number three is a fiery redhead... 311 00:19:04,970 --> 00:19:07,519 from a dragon-guarded castle surrounded by hot boiling lava! 312 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:09,649 But don't let that cool you off. 313 00:19:09,730 --> 00:19:12,899 She's a loaded pistol who likes pina coladas and getting caught in the rain. 314 00:19:12,980 --> 00:19:17,029 Yours for the rescuing, Princess Fiona! 315 00:19:17,110 --> 00:19:19,569 So will it be bachelorette number one, 316 00:19:19,660 --> 00:19:23,159 bachelorette number two or bachelorette number three? 317 00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:25,409 - Two! Two! - Three! Three! 318 00:19:25,490 --> 00:19:26,829 - Two! Two! - Three! 319 00:19:26,910 --> 00:19:29,039 Three? One? [ SHUDDERS ] Three? 320 00:19:29,120 --> 00:19:31,169 Three! Pick number three, my Lord! 321 00:19:31,250 --> 00:19:34,999 Okay, okay, uh, number three! 322 00:19:35,090 --> 00:19:39,839 Lord Farquaad, you've chosen Princess Fiona. 323 00:19:39,930 --> 00:19:43,719 ♪ If you love pina coladas ♪ 324 00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:47,139 ♪ - And getting caught in the rain ♪ ♪ - Princess Fiona. ♪ 325 00:19:47,220 --> 00:19:49,389 ♪ - If you're not into yoga ♪ ♪ - She's perfect. ♪ 326 00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:52,229 All I have to do is just find someone who can go... 327 00:19:52,310 --> 00:19:55,030 But I probably should mention the little thing that happens at night. 328 00:19:55,110 --> 00:19:57,029 - I'll do it. - Yes, but after sunset... 329 00:19:57,110 --> 00:20:00,739 Silence! I will make this Princess Fiona my queen, 330 00:20:00,820 --> 00:20:04,989 and DuLoc will finally have the perfect king! 331 00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:07,289 Captain, assemble your finest men. 332 00:20:07,370 --> 00:20:11,249 We're going to have a tournament. 333 00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:15,919 But that's it. That's it right there. That's DuLoc. 334 00:20:16,000 --> 00:20:18,049 I told ta I'd find it. 335 00:20:18,130 --> 00:20:22,259 So, that must be Lord Farquaad's castle. 336 00:20:22,340 --> 00:20:24,429 [ DONKEY ] Uh-huh. That's the place. 337 00:20:24,510 --> 00:20:27,929 Do you think maybe he's compensating for something? 338 00:20:28,020 --> 00:20:30,099 [ LAUGHS ] 339 00:20:30,180 --> 00:20:32,099 [ GROANS ] 340 00:20:32,190 --> 00:20:34,149 Hey, wait. Wait up, Shrek. 341 00:20:34,230 --> 00:20:37,109 Hurry, darling. We're late. Hurry. 342 00:20:38,690 --> 00:20:42,239 - Hey, you! - [ SCREAMS ] 343 00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:45,159 Wait a second. Look, I'm not gonna eat ta. 344 00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:49,159 - I just... I just... - [ WHIMPERING ] 345 00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:51,329 [ SIGHS ] 346 00:20:52,870 --> 00:20:55,579 [ WHIMPERING, GROANS ] 347 00:21:03,340 --> 00:21:05,259 [ TURNSTILE CLATTERS ] 348 00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:08,759 [ CHUCKLES ] 349 00:21:08,850 --> 00:21:11,349 [ SIGHS ] 350 00:21:11,430 --> 00:21:15,309 ♪ [ INSTRUMENTAL MUZAK ] ♪ 351 00:21:19,690 --> 00:21:21,279 It's quiet. 352 00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,989 Too quiet. 353 00:21:26,070 --> 00:21:28,489 [ CREAKING ] 354 00:21:28,580 --> 00:21:32,699 - Where is everybody? - Hey, look at this! 355 00:21:35,420 --> 00:21:38,789 [ CLATTERING, WHIRRING, CLICKING ] 356 00:21:38,880 --> 00:21:42,339 [ CLICKING ] 357 00:21:42,420 --> 00:21:46,009 [ CLICKING QUICKENS ] 358 00:21:46,090 --> 00:21:49,509 ♪ Welcome to DuLoc ♪ ♪ such a perfect town ♪ 359 00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:53,019 ♪ Here we have some rules ♪ ♪ Let us lay them down ♪ 360 00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:56,979 ♪ Don't make waves, stay in line ♪ ♪ and we'll get along fine ♪ 361 00:21:57,060 --> 00:22:00,689 ♪ DuLoc is a perfect place ♪ 362 00:22:00,770 --> 00:22:05,319 ♪ Please keep off of the grass ♪ ♪ Shine your shoes, wipe your... face ♪ 363 00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:08,989 ♪ DuLoc is, DuLoc is ♪ 364 00:22:09,070 --> 00:22:12,539 ♪ DuLoc is a perfect ♪ 365 00:22:12,620 --> 00:22:16,039 ♪ - Place ♪ ♪ - [ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ] ♪ 366 00:22:16,120 --> 00:22:18,709 [ WHIRRING ] 367 00:22:19,790 --> 00:22:24,009 Wow! Let's do that again! 368 00:22:24,090 --> 00:22:26,759 No. No. No, no, no! No. 369 00:22:26,840 --> 00:22:29,089 ♪ [ TRUMPET FANFARE ] ♪ 370 00:22:29,180 --> 00:22:31,559 - [ CROWD CHEERING ] - [ FARQUAAD ] Brave knights. 371 00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:35,769 ♪ - You are the best and brightest in ♪ ♪ all the land. - [ DONKEY HUMMING ] ♪ 372 00:22:35,850 --> 00:22:38,269 Today one of you shall prove himself... 373 00:22:38,350 --> 00:22:40,689 All right. You're going the right way for a smacked bottom. 374 00:22:40,770 --> 00:22:42,689 - Sorry about that. - [ CHEERING ] 375 00:22:42,770 --> 00:22:48,279 That champion shall have the honour... No, no... the privilege... 376 00:22:48,360 --> 00:22:52,409 to go forth and rescue the lovely Princess Fiona... 377 00:22:52,490 --> 00:22:55,829 from the fiery keep oft he dragon. 378 00:22:55,910 --> 00:23:00,129 If for any reason the winner is unsuccessful, 379 00:23:00,210 --> 00:23:03,379 the first runner-up will take his place... 380 00:23:03,460 --> 00:23:06,259 and so on and so forth. 381 00:23:06,340 --> 00:23:11,759 Some of you may die, but it's a sacrifice I am willing to make. 382 00:23:11,850 --> 00:23:14,639 [ CHEERING ] 383 00:23:16,890 --> 00:23:19,309 Let the tournament begin! 384 00:23:23,020 --> 00:23:24,939 - [ GASPS ] - Oh! 385 00:23:25,030 --> 00:23:28,279 - What is that? - [ GASPING ] 386 00:23:28,360 --> 00:23:32,949 - It's hideous! - Ah, that's not very nice. 387 00:23:33,030 --> 00:23:35,449 - It's just a donkey. - Huh? 388 00:23:35,540 --> 00:23:38,499 Indeed. Knights, new plan! 389 00:23:38,580 --> 00:23:43,289 The one who kills the ogre will be named champion! Have at him! 390 00:23:43,380 --> 00:23:47,299 - Get him! - Oh, hey! Now come on! Hang on now. 391 00:23:47,380 --> 00:23:49,679 [ WOMAN ] Go ahead! Get him! 392 00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:53,429 Can't we just settle this over a pint? 393 00:23:53,510 --> 00:23:54,759 [ MAN ] Kill the beast! 394 00:23:54,850 --> 00:23:59,309 No? All right then. 395 00:23:59,390 --> 00:24:01,479 Come on! 396 00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:13,699 ♪ I don't give a damn ♪ ♪ about my reputation ♪ 397 00:24:13,780 --> 00:24:17,789 ♪ - You're living in the past ♪ ♪ It's a new generation - Damn! ♪ 398 00:24:17,870 --> 00:24:20,659 ♪ - [ WHINNYING ] - A girl can ♪ ♪ do what she wants to do ♪ 399 00:24:20,750 --> 00:24:22,999 ♪ And that's what ♪ ♪ I'm gonna do ♪ 400 00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:26,999 ♪ And I don't give a damn ♪ ♪ about my bad reputation ♪ 401 00:24:27,090 --> 00:24:30,839 ♪ Oh, no, no, no, no, no ♪ ♪ Not me ♪ 402 00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:34,299 ♪ - Me, me, me ♪ ♪ - Hey, Shrek, tag me! Tag me! ♪ 403 00:24:34,390 --> 00:24:37,139 ♪ And I don't give a damn ♪ ♪ about my reputation ♪ 404 00:24:37,220 --> 00:24:39,469 ♪ Never said I wanted ♪ ♪ to improve my station ♪ 405 00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:42,059 Ah! [ LAUGHS ] 406 00:24:42,140 --> 00:24:44,700 ♪ And I'm always feeling good ♪ ♪ when I'm having fun Yeah! ♪ 407 00:24:44,724 --> 00:24:46,359 ♪ And I don't have ♪ ♪ to please no one ♪ 408 00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:48,359 The chair! Give him the chair! 409 00:24:48,440 --> 00:24:51,069 ♪ And I don't give a damn ♪ ♪ about my bad reputation ♪ 410 00:24:51,150 --> 00:24:54,319 ♪ Oh, no, no, no, no, no ♪ ♪ Not me ♪ 411 00:24:54,410 --> 00:24:55,819 ♪ Me, me, me ♪ 412 00:24:55,910 --> 00:24:58,579 ♪ Oh, no, no, no, no ♪ 413 00:24:58,660 --> 00:25:02,329 ♪ Not me, not me ♪ 414 00:25:02,410 --> 00:25:04,879 ♪ - Not me ♪ ♪ - [ BELL DINGS ] ♪ 415 00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:07,919 - [ CHEERING ] - [ LAUGHS ] 416 00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:13,219 Oh, yeah! Ah! Ah! 417 00:25:13,300 --> 00:25:16,089 Thank you! Thank you very much! 418 00:25:16,180 --> 00:25:18,559 I'm here till Thursday. Try the veal! Ha, ha! 419 00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:23,099 - [ SHREK LAUGHS ] - [ CROWD GASPING, MURMURING ] 420 00:25:25,020 --> 00:25:26,979 Shall I give the order, sir? 421 00:25:27,060 --> 00:25:30,649 No, I have a better idea. 422 00:25:30,730 --> 00:25:35,909 People of DuLoc, I give you our champion! 423 00:25:35,990 --> 00:25:39,869 - What? - Congratulations, ogre. 424 00:25:39,950 --> 00:25:44,289 You've won the honour of embarking on a great and noble quest. 425 00:25:44,370 --> 00:25:48,749 Quest? I'm already on a quest, a quest to get my swamp back. 426 00:25:48,840 --> 00:25:52,049 - Your swamp? - Yeah, my swamp! 427 00:25:52,130 --> 00:25:54,589 Where you dumped those fairy tale creatures! 428 00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:57,259 - [ CROWD MURMURING ] - Indeed. 429 00:25:57,340 --> 00:25:59,429 All right, ogre, I'll make you a deal. 430 00:25:59,510 --> 00:26:03,309 Go on this quest for me, and I'll give you your swamp back. 431 00:26:03,390 --> 00:26:06,099 Exactly the way it was? 432 00:26:06,190 --> 00:26:08,939 Down to the last slime-covered toad stool. 433 00:26:09,020 --> 00:26:12,279 - And the squatters? - As good as gone. 434 00:26:15,320 --> 00:26:19,279 What kind of quest? 435 00:26:19,620 --> 00:26:22,016 [ DONKEY ] Let me get this straight. You're gonna go fight a dragon... 436 00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:24,720 and rescue a princess just so Farquaad will give you back a swamp... 437 00:26:24,749 --> 00:26:27,949 which you only don't have because he filled it full of freaks in the first place. 438 00:26:27,970 --> 00:26:32,299 - Is that about right? - Maybe there's a good reason donkeys shouldn't talk. 439 00:26:32,380 --> 00:26:35,919 I don't get it. Why don't you just pull some of that ogre stuff on him? 440 00:26:36,010 --> 00:26:37,929 Throttle him, lay siege to his fortress, 441 00:26:38,010 --> 00:26:40,849 grind his bones to make your bread, the whole ogre trip. 442 00:26:40,930 --> 00:26:42,849 Oh, I know what. 443 00:26:42,930 --> 00:26:45,139 Maybe I could have decapitated an entire village... 444 00:26:45,230 --> 00:26:47,349 and put their heads on a pike, 445 00:26:47,440 --> 00:26:51,059 gotten a knife, cut open their spleen and drink their fluids. 446 00:26:51,150 --> 00:26:53,279 Does that sound good to you? 447 00:26:53,360 --> 00:26:55,989 Uh, no, not really, no. 448 00:26:56,070 --> 00:26:59,869 For your information, there's a lot more to ogres than people think. 449 00:26:59,950 --> 00:27:02,699 - Example? - Example? 450 00:27:02,780 --> 00:27:08,919 - Okay, um, ogres are like onions. - [ SNIFFS ] They stink? 451 00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:11,289 - Yes... No! - They make you cry? - No! 452 00:27:11,380 --> 00:27:14,799 You leave them out in the sun, they get all brown, start sprouting little white hairs. 453 00:27:14,880 --> 00:27:16,879 No! Layers! 454 00:27:16,970 --> 00:27:19,299 Onions have layers. 455 00:27:19,380 --> 00:27:22,679 Ogres have layers! Onions have layers. 456 00:27:22,760 --> 00:27:25,179 You get it? We both have layers. [ SIGHS ] 457 00:27:27,100 --> 00:27:30,689 Oh, you both have layers. Oh. 458 00:27:30,770 --> 00:27:34,149 [ SNIFFS ] You know, not everybody likes onions. 459 00:27:34,230 --> 00:27:36,859 Cake! Everybody loves cakes! Cakes have layers. 460 00:27:36,940 --> 00:27:40,859 I don't care... what everyone likes. 461 00:27:40,950 --> 00:27:44,659 Ogres are not like cakes. 462 00:27:46,500 --> 00:27:49,869 You know what else everybody likes? Parfaits. 463 00:27:49,959 --> 00:27:52,319 Have you ever met a person, you say, Let's get some parfait, 464 00:27:52,340 --> 00:27:53,879 they say, No, I don't like no parfait? 465 00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:56,709 - Parfaits are delicious. - No! 466 00:27:56,800 --> 00:27:59,549 You dense, irritating, miniature beast of burden! 467 00:27:59,630 --> 00:28:02,549 Ogres are like onions! End of story. 468 00:28:02,640 --> 00:28:04,599 Bye-bye. See ta later. 469 00:28:08,430 --> 00:28:12,859 Parfaits may be the most delicious thing on the whole damn planet. 470 00:28:12,940 --> 00:28:15,149 You know, I think I preferred your humming. 471 00:28:15,230 --> 00:28:17,899 Do you have a tissue or something? I'm making a mess. 472 00:28:17,990 --> 00:28:20,899 Just the word parfait make me start slobbering. 473 00:28:25,330 --> 00:28:31,209 ♪ I'm on my way from misery ♪ ♪ to happiness today ♪ 474 00:28:31,290 --> 00:28:33,789 ♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪ ♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪ 475 00:28:33,880 --> 00:28:39,339 ♪ I'm on my way from misery ♪ ♪ to happiness today ♪ 476 00:28:39,420 --> 00:28:41,879 ♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪ ♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪ 477 00:28:41,970 --> 00:28:45,889 ♪ And everything ♪ ♪ that you receive up yonder ♪ 478 00:28:45,970 --> 00:28:49,889 ♪ Is what you give to me ♪ ♪ the day I wander ♪ 479 00:28:49,980 --> 00:28:52,939 ♪ I'm on my way ♪ 480 00:28:54,020 --> 00:28:56,939 ♪ I'm on my way ♪ 481 00:28:58,030 --> 00:29:00,109 ♪ I'm on my way ♪ 482 00:29:00,190 --> 00:29:02,649 Ooh! Shrek! Did you do that? 483 00:29:02,740 --> 00:29:06,529 You gotta warn somebody before you just crack one off. My mouth was open. 484 00:29:06,620 --> 00:29:10,329 Believe me, Donkey, if it was me, you'd be dead. 485 00:29:10,410 --> 00:29:13,169 [ SNIFFS ] It's brimstone. 486 00:29:13,250 --> 00:29:16,419 - We must be getting close. - Yeah, right, brimstone. 487 00:29:16,500 --> 00:29:20,589 Don't be talking about it's the brimstone. I know what I smell. It wasn't no brimstone. 488 00:29:20,670 --> 00:29:22,629 It didn't come off no stone neither. 489 00:29:25,550 --> 00:29:27,759 [ RUMBLING ] 490 00:29:40,650 --> 00:29:43,989 Sure, it's big enough, but look at the location. 491 00:29:44,070 --> 00:29:47,029 [ LAUGHING ] 492 00:29:47,120 --> 00:29:51,829 Uh, Shrek? Uh, remember when you said ogres have layers? 493 00:29:51,910 --> 00:29:53,829 Oh, aye. 494 00:29:53,910 --> 00:29:57,499 Well, I have a bit of a confession to make. 495 00:29:57,580 --> 00:30:00,959 Donkeys don't have layers. We wear our fear right out there on our sleeves. 496 00:30:01,050 --> 00:30:05,129 - Wait a second. Donkeys don't have sleeves. - You know what I mean. 497 00:30:05,220 --> 00:30:07,889 You can't tell me you're afraid of heights. 498 00:30:07,970 --> 00:30:12,559 I'm just a little uncomfortable about being on a rickety bridge over a boiling lake of lava! 499 00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:16,689 Come on, Donkey. I'm right here beside ta, okay? 500 00:30:16,770 --> 00:30:19,439 For emotional support, 501 00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:24,069 we'll just tackle this thing together one little baby step at a time. 502 00:30:24,150 --> 00:30:26,069 - Really? - Really, really. 503 00:30:26,150 --> 00:30:29,369 - Okay, that makes me feel so much better. - Just keep moving. 504 00:30:29,450 --> 00:30:34,039 - And don't look down. - Okay, don't look down. Don't look down. 505 00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:37,499 Don't look down. Keep on moving. Don't look down. 506 00:30:37,580 --> 00:30:41,379 [ GASPS ] Shrek! I'm looking down! 507 00:30:41,460 --> 00:30:44,379 Oh, God, I can't do this! Just let me off, please! 508 00:30:44,460 --> 00:30:48,009 - But you're already halfway. - But I know that half is safe! 509 00:30:48,090 --> 00:30:50,889 Okay, fine. I don't have time for this. You go back. 510 00:30:50,970 --> 00:30:53,389 - Shrek, no! Wait! - Just, Donkey... 511 00:30:53,470 --> 00:30:56,559 - Let's have a dance then, shall we? - Don't do that! 512 00:30:56,640 --> 00:31:00,519 Oh, I'm sorry. Do what? 513 00:31:00,610 --> 00:31:03,689 - Oh, this? - Yes, that! 514 00:31:03,780 --> 00:31:07,199 Yes? Yes, do it. Okay. 515 00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:09,569 [ SCREAMS ] No, Shrek! 516 00:31:09,660 --> 00:31:12,779 - No! Stop it! - You said do it! I'm doing it. 517 00:31:12,870 --> 00:31:17,119 I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die. Shrek, I'm gonna die. 518 00:31:17,210 --> 00:31:19,709 Oh! 519 00:31:19,790 --> 00:31:23,799 That'll do, Donkey. That'll do. 520 00:31:27,170 --> 00:31:29,429 Cool. 521 00:31:29,510 --> 00:31:32,259 [ DONKEY ] So where is this fire-breathing pain-in-the-neck anyway? 522 00:31:32,350 --> 00:31:36,099 Inside, waiting for us to rescue her. 523 00:31:36,180 --> 00:31:39,099 [ CHUCKLES ] I was talking about the dragon, Shrek. 524 00:31:40,560 --> 00:31:42,439 [ WATER DRIPPING ] 525 00:31:44,110 --> 00:31:46,029 [ WIND HOWLING ] 526 00:31:54,580 --> 00:31:56,499 [ DONKEY WHISPERING ] You afraid? 527 00:31:56,580 --> 00:31:59,869 No, but... Shh. 528 00:31:59,960 --> 00:32:03,499 Oh, good. Me neither. [ GASPS ] 529 00:32:03,590 --> 00:32:06,959 'Cause there's nothing wrong with being afraid. 530 00:32:07,050 --> 00:32:10,299 Fear's a sensible response to an unfamiliar situation. 531 00:32:10,380 --> 00:32:12,429 Unfamiliar dangerous situation, I might add. 532 00:32:12,510 --> 00:32:15,190 With a dragon that breathes fire and eats knights and breathes fire, 533 00:32:15,220 --> 00:32:18,679 it sure doesn't mean you're a coward if you're a little scared. 534 00:32:18,770 --> 00:32:22,769 I sure as heck am not a coward. I know that. [ GASPS ] 535 00:32:22,860 --> 00:32:26,189 Donkey, two things, okay? 536 00:32:26,280 --> 00:32:28,819 Shut... up. 537 00:32:28,900 --> 00:32:31,659 Now go over there and see if you can find any stairs. 538 00:32:31,740 --> 00:32:34,369 Stairs? I thought we was looking for the princess. 539 00:32:34,450 --> 00:32:39,329 The princess will be up the stairs in the highest room in the tallest tower. 540 00:32:39,410 --> 00:32:42,999 - What makes you think she'll be there? - I read it in a book once. 541 00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:46,999 Cool. You handle the dragon. I'll handle the stairs. 542 00:32:47,090 --> 00:32:50,129 I'll find those stairs. I'll whip their butt too. 543 00:32:50,220 --> 00:32:52,179 Those stairs won't know which way they're going. 544 00:32:52,260 --> 00:32:54,679 [ CREAKING ] 545 00:32:56,680 --> 00:32:58,639 I'm gonna take drastic steps. 546 00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:01,519 Kick it to the kerb. Don't mess with me. I'm the stair master. 547 00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:06,189 I've mastered the stairs. I wish I had a step right here. I'd step all over it. 548 00:33:09,150 --> 00:33:12,699 Well, at least we know where the princess is, but where's the... 549 00:33:12,780 --> 00:33:17,029 Dragon! [ SCREAMS ] 550 00:33:18,120 --> 00:33:20,039 [ GASPS ] 551 00:33:25,420 --> 00:33:27,089 [ ROARS ] 552 00:33:30,630 --> 00:33:32,879 Donkey, look out! [ SCREAMS ] 553 00:33:34,090 --> 00:33:38,059 [ SCREAMS ] 554 00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:42,229 [ WHIMPERING ] 555 00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:46,519 - Got ta! - [ ROARS ] 556 00:33:46,610 --> 00:33:49,689 [ GASPS ] 557 00:33:49,780 --> 00:33:55,029 [ SHOUTS ] Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! 558 00:33:55,110 --> 00:33:58,079 [ SCREAMING ] 559 00:34:06,290 --> 00:34:08,919 [ GASPS ] 560 00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:13,629 Oh! Aah! Aah! 561 00:34:13,720 --> 00:34:17,219 [ GASPING ] 562 00:34:18,430 --> 00:34:22,219 [ GROWLS ] 563 00:34:22,310 --> 00:34:25,729 No. Oh, no. No! [ SCREAMS ] 564 00:34:25,810 --> 00:34:29,439 - Oh, what large teeth you have. - [ GROWLS ] 565 00:34:29,520 --> 00:34:33,359 I mean, white, sparkling teeth. I know you probably hear this all the time from your food, 566 00:34:33,440 --> 00:34:37,569 but you must bleach, 'cause that is one dazzling smile you got there. 567 00:34:37,660 --> 00:34:40,159 Do I detect a hint of minty freshness? 568 00:34:40,240 --> 00:34:44,999 And you know what else? You're... You're a girl dragon! 569 00:34:45,080 --> 00:34:49,589 Oh, sure! I mean, of course you're a girl dragon. 570 00:34:49,670 --> 00:34:53,459 You're just reeking of feminine beauty. 571 00:34:53,550 --> 00:34:55,879 What's the matter with you? You got something in your eye? 572 00:34:55,970 --> 00:34:58,799 Ooh. Oh. Oh. 573 00:34:58,850 --> 00:35:01,450 Man, I'd really love to stay, but, you know, I'm, uh... [ COUGHS ] 574 00:35:01,474 --> 00:35:05,349 I'm an asthmatic, and I don't know if it'd work out if you're gonna blow smoke rings. 575 00:35:05,430 --> 00:35:07,349 Shrek! [ GASPS ] 576 00:35:07,440 --> 00:35:11,149 [ WHIMPERING ] No! Shrek! Shrek! 577 00:35:11,230 --> 00:35:13,149 Shrek! 578 00:35:13,780 --> 00:35:17,029 [ Groans, Sighs ] 579 00:35:17,110 --> 00:35:20,319 ♪ [ CHORUS VOCALISING ] ♪ 580 00:35:24,790 --> 00:35:28,999 ♪ [ VOCALISING CONTINUES ] ♪ 581 00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:44,349 ♪ [ VOCALISING CONTINUES ] ♪ 582 00:35:44,430 --> 00:35:45,849 Oh! Oh! 583 00:35:45,930 --> 00:35:47,849 - Wake up! - What? 584 00:35:47,940 --> 00:35:49,559 Are you Princess Fiona? 585 00:35:49,650 --> 00:35:54,979 I am, awaiting a knight so bold as to rescue me. 586 00:35:55,070 --> 00:35:57,069 Oh, that's nice. Now let's go! 587 00:35:57,150 --> 00:35:59,149 But wait, Sir Knight. 588 00:35:59,240 --> 00:36:01,529 This be-ith our first meeting. 589 00:36:01,620 --> 00:36:05,329 Should it not be a wonderful, romantic moment? 590 00:36:05,410 --> 00:36:09,749 - Yeah, sorry, lady. There's no time. - Hey, wait. What are you doing? 591 00:36:09,830 --> 00:36:11,919 You should sweep me off my feet... 592 00:36:12,000 --> 00:36:15,379 out yonder window and down a rope on to your valiant steed. 593 00:36:15,460 --> 00:36:18,259 You've had a lot of time to plan this, haven't you? 594 00:36:18,340 --> 00:36:22,589 Mm-hmm. [ SCREAMS, GRUNTS ] 595 00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:25,559 But we have to savour this moment! 596 00:36:25,640 --> 00:36:28,389 You could recite an epic poem for me. 597 00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:30,939 A ballad? A sonnet! 598 00:36:31,020 --> 00:36:34,269 - A Limerick? Or something! - I don't think so. 599 00:36:34,360 --> 00:36:38,779 Can I at least know the name of my champion? 600 00:36:38,860 --> 00:36:40,779 Um, Shrek. 601 00:36:40,860 --> 00:36:44,579 Sir Shrek. [ CLEARS THROAT ] 602 00:36:44,660 --> 00:36:49,409 I pray that you take this favour as a token of my gratitude. 603 00:36:50,540 --> 00:36:52,539 Thanks! 604 00:36:54,290 --> 00:36:56,459 [ ROARING ] 605 00:36:56,550 --> 00:36:58,379 You didn't slay the dragon? 606 00:36:58,460 --> 00:37:00,919 - It's on my to-do list. Now come on! - [ SCREAMS ] 607 00:37:01,010 --> 00:37:03,589 But this isn't right! 608 00:37:03,680 --> 00:37:05,929 You were meant to charge in, sword drawn, banner flying. 609 00:37:06,010 --> 00:37:08,099 That's what all the other knights did. 610 00:37:08,180 --> 00:37:10,479 Yeah, right before they burst into flame. 611 00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:14,099 That's not the point. Oh! 612 00:37:14,190 --> 00:37:16,649 Wait. Where are you going? The exit's over there. 613 00:37:16,730 --> 00:37:18,779 Well, I have to save my ass. 614 00:37:18,860 --> 00:37:22,069 What kind of knight are you? 615 00:37:22,150 --> 00:37:24,569 One of a kind. 616 00:37:24,660 --> 00:37:27,029 [ DONKEY ] Slowdown. Slowdown, baby, please. 617 00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:31,329 I believe it's healthy to get to know someone over a long period of time. 618 00:37:31,410 --> 00:37:33,999 Just call me old-fashioned. [ LAUGHS ] 619 00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:37,589 I don't want to rush into a physical relationship. 620 00:37:37,670 --> 00:37:41,129 I'm not emotionally ready for a commitment of, uh, this... 621 00:37:41,220 --> 00:37:43,509 Magnitude really is the word I'm looking for. 622 00:37:43,590 --> 00:37:47,099 Magnitude... Hey, that is unwanted physical contact. 623 00:37:47,180 --> 00:37:49,639 Hey, what are you doing? 624 00:37:49,720 --> 00:37:52,979 Okay, okay. Let's just backup a little and take this one step a ta time. 625 00:37:53,060 --> 00:37:57,189 We really should get to know each other first as friends or pen pals. 626 00:37:57,270 --> 00:38:01,489 I'm on the road a lot, but I just love receiving cards... 627 00:38:01,570 --> 00:38:03,989 I'd really love to stay, but... 628 00:38:04,070 --> 00:38:06,659 Don't do that! That's my tail! That's my personal tail. 629 00:38:06,740 --> 00:38:10,159 You're gonna tear it off. I don't give permission... What are you gonna do with that? 630 00:38:10,240 --> 00:38:14,039 Hey, now. No way. No! No! 631 00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:16,879 No, no! No. No, no, no! No! Oh! 632 00:38:21,760 --> 00:38:23,719 [ GROWLS ] 633 00:38:26,590 --> 00:38:28,509 [ ROARS ] 634 00:38:42,230 --> 00:38:43,649 - [ ROARING ] - [ GASPS ] 635 00:38:43,740 --> 00:38:45,699 - Hi, Princess! - It talks! 636 00:38:45,780 --> 00:38:49,529 Yeah, it's getting him to shut up that's the trick. 637 00:38:49,620 --> 00:38:50,869 [ SCREAMS ] 638 00:38:52,410 --> 00:38:54,709 [ SCREAMING ] 639 00:38:54,790 --> 00:38:56,419 Oh! 640 00:38:56,500 --> 00:38:57,879 - [ THUDS ] - [ GROANS ] 641 00:38:57,960 --> 00:39:01,379 [ SHREK GROANS ] 642 00:39:01,460 --> 00:39:04,589 [ ROARS ] 643 00:39:06,590 --> 00:39:08,509 [ ROARS ] 644 00:39:09,970 --> 00:39:12,889 [ ROARING ] 645 00:39:14,470 --> 00:39:17,019 [ ROARS ] 646 00:39:25,110 --> 00:39:27,029 Okay, you two, head for the exit! 647 00:39:28,160 --> 00:39:30,699 I'll take care of the dragon. 648 00:39:37,290 --> 00:39:42,709 [ ECHOING ] Run! 649 00:39:52,350 --> 00:39:56,019 [ GASPING ] 650 00:39:56,100 --> 00:39:58,269 [ SCREAMING ] 651 00:39:58,350 --> 00:40:01,559 [ ROARING ] 652 00:40:03,520 --> 00:40:06,439 - [ SCREAMS ] - [ ROARS ] 653 00:40:10,360 --> 00:40:14,119 [ PANTING, SIGHS ] 654 00:40:14,200 --> 00:40:16,119 [ WHIMPERS ] 655 00:40:16,200 --> 00:40:18,789 [ ROARS ] 656 00:40:20,500 --> 00:40:23,839 [ ROARS, WHIMPERS ] 657 00:40:24,290 --> 00:40:28,969 - [ DRAGON GROWLING IN THE DISTANCE ] - You did it! 658 00:40:29,050 --> 00:40:31,929 You rescued me! You're amazing. You're... 659 00:40:32,010 --> 00:40:35,759 You're wonderful. You're... 660 00:40:35,850 --> 00:40:38,139 a little unorthodox I'll admit. 661 00:40:38,230 --> 00:40:43,149 But thy deed is great, and thine heart is pure. 662 00:40:43,230 --> 00:40:47,029 - I am eternally in your debt. - [ CLEARS THROAT ] 663 00:40:47,110 --> 00:40:51,449 And where would a brave knight be without his noble steed? 664 00:40:51,530 --> 00:40:56,199 I hope you heard that. She called me a noble steed. She think I'm a steed. 665 00:40:56,290 --> 00:40:59,449 [ FIONA LAUGHS ] The battle is won. 666 00:40:59,540 --> 00:41:02,039 You may remove your helmet, good Sir Knight. 667 00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:04,709 - Uh, no. - Why not? 668 00:41:04,790 --> 00:41:06,999 I have helmet hair. 669 00:41:07,090 --> 00:41:10,299 Please. I would'st look upon the face of my rescuer. 670 00:41:10,380 --> 00:41:12,969 No, no, you wouldn't... 'St. 671 00:41:13,050 --> 00:41:15,509 But how will you kiss me? 672 00:41:15,600 --> 00:41:19,349 What? That wasn't in the job description. 673 00:41:19,430 --> 00:41:21,809 Maybe it's a perk. 674 00:41:21,890 --> 00:41:26,319 No, it's destiny. Oh, you must know how it goes. 675 00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:30,189 A princess locked in a tower and beset by a dragon... 676 00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:33,199 is rescued by a brave knight, 677 00:41:33,280 --> 00:41:36,579 and then they share true love's first kiss. 678 00:41:36,660 --> 00:41:38,739 Hmm? With Shrek? You think... Wait. 679 00:41:38,830 --> 00:41:41,999 Wait. You think that Shrek is your true love? 680 00:41:42,080 --> 00:41:44,079 Well, yes. 681 00:41:45,790 --> 00:41:48,049 - [ LAUGHING ] - [ LAUGHING ] 682 00:41:48,130 --> 00:41:50,589 You think Shrek is your true love! 683 00:41:50,670 --> 00:41:52,589 What is so funny? 684 00:41:52,670 --> 00:41:55,759 Let's just say I'm not your type, okay? 685 00:41:55,840 --> 00:41:59,349 Of course, you are. You're my rescuer. 686 00:41:59,430 --> 00:42:01,889 Now... Now remove your helmet. 687 00:42:01,980 --> 00:42:04,189 Look. I really don't think this is a good idea. 688 00:42:04,270 --> 00:42:06,269 - Just take off the helmet. - I'm not going to. 689 00:42:06,360 --> 00:42:07,519 - Take it off. - No! 690 00:42:07,610 --> 00:42:09,689 - Now! - Okay! 691 00:42:09,780 --> 00:42:14,279 Easy. As you command, Your Highness. 692 00:42:24,330 --> 00:42:27,749 You... You're a... an ogre. 693 00:42:27,840 --> 00:42:31,759 Oh, you were expecting Prince Charming. 694 00:42:31,840 --> 00:42:34,339 Well, yes, actually. 695 00:42:36,260 --> 00:42:39,509 Oh, no. This is all wrong. 696 00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:41,889 You're not supposed to be an ogre. 697 00:42:41,970 --> 00:42:47,229 [ SIGHS ] Princess, I was sent to rescue you by Lord Farquaad, okay? 698 00:42:47,310 --> 00:42:49,229 He's the one who wants to marry you. 699 00:42:49,310 --> 00:42:51,229 Then why didn't he come rescue me? 700 00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:55,649 Good question. You should ask him that when we get there. 701 00:42:55,740 --> 00:42:58,779 But I have to be rescued by my true love, 702 00:42:58,870 --> 00:43:01,619 not by some ogre and his... his pet. 703 00:43:01,700 --> 00:43:03,749 So much for noble steed. 704 00:43:03,830 --> 00:43:06,459 You're not making my job any easier. 705 00:43:06,540 --> 00:43:09,919 I'm sorry, but your job is not my problem. 706 00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:15,259 You can tell Lord Farquaad that if he wants to rescue me properly, 707 00:43:15,340 --> 00:43:17,679 I'll be waiting for him right here. 708 00:43:17,760 --> 00:43:22,809 Hey! I'm no one's messenger boy, all right? I'm a delivery boy. 709 00:43:22,890 --> 00:43:25,139 You wouldn't dare. 710 00:43:25,230 --> 00:43:27,229 - Put me down! - Ya coming, Donkey? 711 00:43:27,310 --> 00:43:29,269 I'm right behind ta. 712 00:43:29,350 --> 00:43:32,939 Put me down, or you will suffer the consequences! 713 00:43:33,030 --> 00:43:37,529 This is not dignified! Put me down! [ SCREAMS ] 714 00:43:37,610 --> 00:43:40,489 Okay, so here's another question. 715 00:43:40,570 --> 00:43:43,770 Say there's a woman that digs you, right, but you don't really like her that way. 716 00:43:43,809 --> 00:43:46,249 How do you let her down real easy so her feelings aren't hurt, 717 00:43:46,270 --> 00:43:48,669 but you don't get burned to a crisp and eaten? 718 00:43:48,750 --> 00:43:51,499 You just tell her she's not your true love. 719 00:43:51,590 --> 00:43:54,299 Everyone knowest what happens when you find your... 720 00:43:54,380 --> 00:43:56,969 Hey! [ SIGHS ] 721 00:43:57,050 --> 00:43:59,339 The sooner we get to DuLoc the better. 722 00:43:59,430 --> 00:44:02,349 You're gonna love it there, Princess. It's beautiful! 723 00:44:02,430 --> 00:44:06,179 And what of my groom-to-be? Lord Farquaad? What's he like? 724 00:44:06,270 --> 00:44:08,389 Let me put it this way, Princess. 725 00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:12,479 Men of Farquaad's stature are in short supply. 726 00:44:12,560 --> 00:44:14,479 [ LAUGHS ] 727 00:44:14,570 --> 00:44:18,649 I don't know. There are those who think little of him. 728 00:44:18,740 --> 00:44:20,699 [ BOTH LAUGHING ] 729 00:44:20,780 --> 00:44:23,659 Stop it. Stop it, both of you. 730 00:44:23,740 --> 00:44:28,709 You're just jealous you can never measure up to a great ruler like Lord Farquaad. 731 00:44:28,790 --> 00:44:31,709 Yeah, well, maybe you're right, Princess. 732 00:44:31,790 --> 00:44:35,089 But I'll let you do the measuring when you see him tomorrow. 733 00:44:35,170 --> 00:44:39,379 Tomorrow? It'll take that lon? 734 00:44:39,470 --> 00:44:44,179 - Shouldn't we stop to make camp? - No, that'll take longer. 735 00:44:44,260 --> 00:44:48,679 - We can keep going. - But there's robbers in the woods. 736 00:44:48,770 --> 00:44:52,099 Whoa! Time out, Shrek! Camping is starting to sound good. 737 00:44:52,190 --> 00:44:56,279 Hey, come on. I'm scarier than anything we're going to see in this forest. 738 00:44:56,360 --> 00:44:58,739 I need to find somewhere to camp now! 739 00:44:58,820 --> 00:45:01,029 [ BIRD WINGS FLUTTERING ] 740 00:45:03,070 --> 00:45:05,529 [ GRUNTING ] 741 00:45:05,620 --> 00:45:09,709 - Hey! Over here. - Shrek, we can do better than that. 742 00:45:09,790 --> 00:45:12,369 I don't think this is fit for a princess. 743 00:45:12,460 --> 00:45:15,249 No, no, it's perfect. It just needs a few homey touches. 744 00:45:15,340 --> 00:45:20,259 - Homey touches? Like what? - [ CRASHING ] 745 00:45:20,340 --> 00:45:24,599 A door? Well, gentlemen, I bid thee good night. 746 00:45:24,680 --> 00:45:27,059 You want me to read you a bedtime story? I will. 747 00:45:27,140 --> 00:45:29,469 I said good night! 748 00:45:31,940 --> 00:45:33,899 Shrek, what are you doing? 749 00:45:33,980 --> 00:45:37,019 [ LAUGHS ] I just... You know... Oh, come on. 750 00:45:37,110 --> 00:45:39,739 I was just kidding. 751 00:45:43,030 --> 00:45:44,949 [ FIRE CRACKLING ] 752 00:45:45,030 --> 00:45:48,619 And, uh, that one, that's Throwback, 753 00:45:48,700 --> 00:45:52,119 the only ogre to ever spit over three wheat fields. 754 00:45:52,210 --> 00:45:55,289 Right. Yeah. 755 00:45:55,380 --> 00:45:58,299 Hey, can you tell my future from these stars? 756 00:45:58,380 --> 00:46:01,969 The stars don't tell the future, Donkey. They tell stories. 757 00:46:02,050 --> 00:46:05,639 Look, there's BITNET, the Fitment. 758 00:46:05,720 --> 00:46:09,349 - You can guess what he's famous for. - I know you're making this up. 759 00:46:09,430 --> 00:46:12,139 No, look. There he is, 760 00:46:12,230 --> 00:46:15,309 and there's the group of hunters running away from his stench. 761 00:46:15,400 --> 00:46:17,979 That is nothing but a bunch of little dots. 762 00:46:18,070 --> 00:46:21,989 Sometimes things are more than they appear. 763 00:46:22,070 --> 00:46:24,239 Hmm? 764 00:46:24,320 --> 00:46:26,369 Forget it. 765 00:46:26,450 --> 00:46:29,119 [ SIGHS ] 766 00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:32,959 Hey, Shrek, what we gonna do when we get our swamp anyway? 767 00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:34,829 Our swamp? 768 00:46:34,920 --> 00:46:36,999 You know, when we're through rescuing the princess. 769 00:46:37,080 --> 00:46:41,839 We? Donkey, there's no we. There's no our. 770 00:46:41,920 --> 00:46:44,169 There's just me and my swamp. 771 00:46:44,260 --> 00:46:48,509 The first thing I'm gonna do is build a ten-foot wall around my land. 772 00:46:48,600 --> 00:46:51,099 You cut me deep, Shrek. 773 00:46:51,180 --> 00:46:54,519 You cut me real deep just now. 774 00:46:54,600 --> 00:46:56,519 You know what I think? 775 00:46:56,600 --> 00:46:59,729 I think this whole wall thing is just a way to keep somebody out. 776 00:46:59,820 --> 00:47:03,989 - No, do ta think? - Are you hiding something? 777 00:47:04,070 --> 00:47:06,029 Never mind, Donkey. 778 00:47:06,110 --> 00:47:09,529 Oh, this is another one of those onion things, isn't it? 779 00:47:09,620 --> 00:47:13,199 No, this is one of those drop-it and leave-it-alone things. 780 00:47:13,290 --> 00:47:17,039 - Why don't you want to talk about it? - Why do you want to? 781 00:47:17,120 --> 00:47:18,919 - Why are you blocking? - I'm not blocking. 782 00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:21,249 - Oh, yes, you are. - Donkey, I'm warning you. 783 00:47:21,340 --> 00:47:24,839 - Who you trying to keep out? - Everyone! Okay? 784 00:47:26,090 --> 00:47:28,549 Oh, now we're getting somewhere. 785 00:47:28,640 --> 00:47:31,929 Oh! For the love of Pete! 786 00:47:32,010 --> 00:47:34,429 What's your problem? What you got against the whole world? 787 00:47:34,520 --> 00:47:36,729 I'm not the one with the problem, okay? 788 00:47:36,810 --> 00:47:39,769 It's the world that seems to have a problem with me. 789 00:47:39,860 --> 00:47:43,729 People take one look at me and go, Aah! Help! Run! 790 00:47:43,820 --> 00:47:47,569 A big, stupid, ugly ogre! 791 00:47:47,650 --> 00:47:51,869 [ SIGHS ] They judge me before they even know me. 792 00:47:51,950 --> 00:47:53,869 That's why I'm better off alone. 793 00:48:01,790 --> 00:48:03,999 You know what? 794 00:48:04,090 --> 00:48:09,759 When we met, I didn't think you was just a big, stupid, ugly ogre. 795 00:48:09,840 --> 00:48:12,759 Yeah, I know. 796 00:48:12,850 --> 00:48:16,269 So, uh, are there any donkeys up there? 797 00:48:16,350 --> 00:48:19,729 Well, there's, um, Gabby, 798 00:48:19,810 --> 00:48:22,109 the Small and Annoying. 799 00:48:22,190 --> 00:48:27,109 Okay, I see it now. The big shiny one, right there. That one there? 800 00:48:27,190 --> 00:48:30,359 - That's the moon. - Oh, okay. 801 00:48:40,540 --> 00:48:44,959 ♪ [ ORCHESTRA ] ♪ 802 00:48:46,550 --> 00:48:50,429 ♪ [ DULCIMER ] ♪ 803 00:48:51,720 --> 00:48:54,139 [ FARQUAAD ] Again. Show me again. 804 00:48:54,220 --> 00:48:58,519 [ MUSIC STOPS, REWINDS ] 805 00:48:58,600 --> 00:49:02,689 Mirror, mirror, show her to me. Show me the princess. 806 00:49:02,770 --> 00:49:06,819 ♪ - Humph. ♪ ♪ - [ REWINDS, RESUMES ] ♪ 807 00:49:06,900 --> 00:49:11,699 Ah. Perfect. [ INHALES ] 808 00:49:18,700 --> 00:49:20,619 [ SNORING ] 809 00:49:28,590 --> 00:49:32,049 ♪ [ VOCALISING ] ♪ 810 00:49:32,130 --> 00:49:35,349 ♪ [ VOCALISING CONTINUES ] ♪ 811 00:49:35,430 --> 00:49:38,219 ♪ [ WHISTLING ] ♪ 812 00:49:38,310 --> 00:49:41,559 ♪ [ WHISTLING CONTINUES ] ♪ 813 00:49:41,640 --> 00:49:44,689 ♪ - [ VOCALISES ] ♪ ♪ - [ WHISTLES ] ♪ 814 00:49:44,770 --> 00:49:47,819 ♪ - [ VOCALISES ] ♪ ♪ - [ WHISTLES ] ♪ 815 00:49:47,900 --> 00:49:50,989 ♪ - [ VOCALISING ] ♪ ♪ - [ WHISTLING ] ♪ 816 00:49:51,070 --> 00:49:54,489 ♪ - [ VOCALISING, HIGH-PITCHED ] ♪ ♪ - [ WHISTLING, HIGH-PITCHED ] ♪ 817 00:49:54,570 --> 00:49:56,829 ♪ [ CONTINUES ] ♪ 818 00:49:59,160 --> 00:50:00,699 [ SIZZLING ] 819 00:50:07,630 --> 00:50:11,719 [ SNIFFS, YAWNS ] 820 00:50:15,010 --> 00:50:17,889 Mmm, yeah, you know I like it like that. 821 00:50:17,970 --> 00:50:22,229 - Come on, baby. I said I like it. - Donkey, wake up. 822 00:50:22,310 --> 00:50:24,849 - Huh? What? - Wake up. 823 00:50:24,940 --> 00:50:26,899 - What? - Good morning. 824 00:50:26,980 --> 00:50:30,229 How do you like your eggs? 825 00:50:30,320 --> 00:50:34,279 - Good morning, Princess! - What's all this about? 826 00:50:34,360 --> 00:50:38,329 We kind of got off to a bad start yesterday. 827 00:50:38,410 --> 00:50:40,409 I wanted to make it up to you. 828 00:50:40,490 --> 00:50:45,039 After all, you did rescue me. 829 00:50:45,120 --> 00:50:48,129 - Uh, thanks. - [ SNIFFS ] 830 00:50:48,210 --> 00:50:52,009 Well, eat up. We've got a big day ahead of us. 831 00:50:56,470 --> 00:50:58,429 - [ BELCHES ] - Shrek! 832 00:50:58,510 --> 00:51:00,389 What? It's a compliment. 833 00:51:00,470 --> 00:51:03,429 Better out than in, I always say. [ LAUGHS ] 834 00:51:03,520 --> 00:51:07,269 Well, it's no way to behave in front of a princess. - [ BELCHES ] 835 00:51:07,350 --> 00:51:09,979 - Thanks. - She's as nasty as you are. 836 00:51:10,070 --> 00:51:14,899 [ LAUGHS ] You know, you're not exactly what I expected. 837 00:51:14,990 --> 00:51:20,079 Maybe you shouldn't judge people before you get to know them. 838 00:51:20,160 --> 00:51:22,789 ♪ [ VOCALISING ] ♪ 839 00:51:22,870 --> 00:51:25,159 [ MAN ] La Liberte! Hey! 840 00:51:25,250 --> 00:51:27,169 Princess! 841 00:51:27,250 --> 00:51:29,919 - [ LAUGHS ] - What are you doing? 842 00:51:30,000 --> 00:51:32,919 Be still, Mon Cherie, for I am your saviour! 843 00:51:33,010 --> 00:51:37,469 And I am rescuing you from this green... [ KISSING SOUNDS ] 844 00:51:37,550 --> 00:51:40,099 - beast. - Hey! 845 00:51:40,180 --> 00:51:42,509 That's my princess! Go find your own! 846 00:51:42,600 --> 00:51:47,639 Please, monster! Can't you see I'm a little busy here? 847 00:51:47,730 --> 00:51:51,319 Look, pal, I don't know who you think you are! 848 00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:53,979 Oh! Of course! Oh, how rude. 849 00:51:54,070 --> 00:51:56,149 Please let me introduce myself. 850 00:51:56,240 --> 00:51:59,109 Oh, Merry Men! [ LAUGHS ] 851 00:51:59,200 --> 00:52:03,159 ♪ [ ACCORDION ] ♪ 852 00:52:03,240 --> 00:52:05,199 ♪ Ta, dah, dah, dah, whoo ♪ 853 00:52:05,290 --> 00:52:07,369 ♪ I steal from the rich ♪ ♪ and give to the needy ♪ 854 00:52:07,460 --> 00:52:09,739 ♪ - He takes a wee percentage ♪ ♪ - But I'm not greedy ♪ 855 00:52:09,760 --> 00:52:11,669 ♪ I rescue pretty damsels ♪ ♪ Man, I'm good ♪ 856 00:52:11,750 --> 00:52:14,709 ♪ - What a guy, Monsieur Hood ♪ ♪ - Break it down. ♪ 857 00:52:18,430 --> 00:52:20,679 ♪ I like an honest fight ♪ ♪ and a saucy little maid ♪ 858 00:52:20,760 --> 00:52:23,479 ♪ - What he's basically saying ♪ ♪ is he likes to get... - Paid ♪ 859 00:52:23,500 --> 00:52:26,219 ♪ - So - When an ogre in the ♪ ♪ bush grabs a lady by the tush ♪ 860 00:52:26,240 --> 00:52:28,059 ♪ - That's bad ♪ ♪ - That's bad ♪ 861 00:52:28,139 --> 00:52:30,499 ♪ When a beauty's with a beast ♪ ♪ it makes me awfully mad ♪ 862 00:52:30,520 --> 00:52:32,399 ♪ He's mad ♪ ♪ He's really, really mad ♪ 863 00:52:32,479 --> 00:52:34,679 ♪ I'll take my blade and ♪ ♪ ram it through your heart ♪ 864 00:52:34,700 --> 00:52:39,029 ♪ Keep your eyes on me, boys ♪ ♪ 'cause I'm about to start ♪ 865 00:52:39,110 --> 00:52:41,699 [ GRUNTS, GROANS ] 866 00:52:41,780 --> 00:52:44,539 - [ KARATE YELL ] - [ MERRY MEN GASPING ] 867 00:52:44,620 --> 00:52:47,249 [ PANTING ] Man, that was annoying! 868 00:52:47,330 --> 00:52:49,079 Oh, you little... 869 00:52:59,130 --> 00:53:01,049 [ Karate Yell ] 870 00:53:04,430 --> 00:53:07,719 ♪ [ ACCORDION ] ♪ 871 00:53:10,690 --> 00:53:13,519 [ SHOUTING, GROANING ] 872 00:53:13,610 --> 00:53:16,229 [ GROANING ] 873 00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:19,399 [ CHUCKLES ] Um, shall we? 874 00:53:20,740 --> 00:53:23,619 - Ho Id the phone. - [ GRUNTS ] 875 00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:27,159 Oh! Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on now. 876 00:53:27,240 --> 00:53:29,249 - Where did that come from? - What? 877 00:53:29,330 --> 00:53:32,209 That! Back there. That was amazing! 878 00:53:32,290 --> 00:53:34,209 Where did you learn that? 879 00:53:34,290 --> 00:53:37,419 Well... [ CHUCKLES ] When one lives alone, 880 00:53:37,500 --> 00:53:40,259 uh, one has to learn these things in case there's a... 881 00:53:40,340 --> 00:53:42,969 - There's an arrow in your butt! - What? 882 00:53:43,050 --> 00:53:46,849 - Oh, would you look at that? - Oh, no. This is all my fault. 883 00:53:46,930 --> 00:53:48,849 - I'm so sorry. - Why? What's wrong? 884 00:53:48,930 --> 00:53:52,269 - Shrek's hurt. - Shrek's hurt. Shrek's hurt? Oh, no, Shrek's gonna die. 885 00:53:52,350 --> 00:53:56,149 - Donkey, I'm okay. - You can't do this to me. I'm too young for you to die. 886 00:53:56,230 --> 00:53:58,359 Keep your legs elevated. Turn your head and cough. 887 00:53:58,440 --> 00:54:01,449 - Does anyone know the Heimlich? - Donkey! Calm down. 888 00:54:01,530 --> 00:54:06,159 If you want to help Shrek, run into the woods and find me a blue flower with red thorns. 889 00:54:06,240 --> 00:54:09,829 Blue flower, red thorns. Okay, I'm on it. Blue flower, red thorns. 890 00:54:09,910 --> 00:54:13,369 Don't die, Shrek. If you see a long tunnel, stay away from the light! 891 00:54:13,460 --> 00:54:16,629 - [ BOTH ] Donkey! - Oh, yeah. Right. Blue flower, red thorns. 892 00:54:16,710 --> 00:54:18,999 - Blue flower, red thorns. - What are the flowers for? 893 00:54:19,090 --> 00:54:21,299 - For getting rid of Donkey. - Ah. 894 00:54:21,380 --> 00:54:23,759 Now you hold still, and I'll yank this thing out. 895 00:54:23,840 --> 00:54:26,049 Ow! Hey! Easy with the yanking. 896 00:54:26,140 --> 00:54:28,759 - I'm sorry, but it has to come out. - No, it's tender. 897 00:54:28,850 --> 00:54:30,599 Now, hold on. 898 00:54:30,630 --> 00:54:32,919 - What you're doing is the opposite of help. - Don't move. 899 00:54:32,940 --> 00:54:35,519 - Look, time out. - Would you... 900 00:54:35,600 --> 00:54:40,069 [ GRUNTS ] Okay. What do you propose we do? 901 00:54:40,109 --> 00:54:43,029 Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns. 902 00:54:43,050 --> 00:54:45,319 This would be so much easier if I wasn't colour-blind! 903 00:54:45,410 --> 00:54:47,489 - Blue flower, red thorns. - [ SHREK ] Ow! 904 00:54:47,570 --> 00:54:49,989 Ho Id on, Shrek! I'm coming! 905 00:54:51,500 --> 00:54:53,619 Ow! Not good. 906 00:54:53,710 --> 00:54:56,249 - Okay. Okay, I can nearly see the head. - [ GRUNTS ] 907 00:54:56,330 --> 00:54:58,959 - It's just about... - Ow! Ohh! 908 00:55:00,800 --> 00:55:03,419 Ahem. 909 00:55:03,510 --> 00:55:06,889 Nothing happened. We were just, uh... 910 00:55:06,970 --> 00:55:09,679 Look, if you wanted to be alone, all you had to do was ask. 911 00:55:09,760 --> 00:55:13,019 Oh, come on! That's the last thing on my mind. 912 00:55:13,100 --> 00:55:16,769 The princess here was just... Ugh! 913 00:55:19,940 --> 00:55:22,649 - Ow! - Hey, what's that? 914 00:55:22,730 --> 00:55:25,569 [ NERVOUS CHUCKLE ] That's... Is that blood? 915 00:55:25,650 --> 00:55:27,569 [ SIGHS ] 916 00:55:27,990 --> 00:55:29,579 [ BIRD CHIRPING ] 917 00:55:33,950 --> 00:55:35,869 [ GRUNTS ] 918 00:55:41,880 --> 00:55:45,549 ♪ My beloved monster and me ♪ 919 00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:51,309 ♪ We go everywhere together ♪ 920 00:55:51,390 --> 00:55:56,099 ♪ Wearing a raincoat ♪ ♪ that has four sleeves ♪ 921 00:55:56,190 --> 00:56:00,809 ♪ - Gets us through all kinds ♪ ♪ of weather - Aah! ♪ 922 00:56:00,900 --> 00:56:06,149 ♪ She will always be ♪ ♪ the only thing ♪ 923 00:56:06,240 --> 00:56:10,739 ♪ That comes between me ♪ ♪ and the awful sting ♪ 924 00:56:10,820 --> 00:56:15,909 ♪ That comes from living in a world ♪ ♪ that's so damn mean ♪ 925 00:56:21,960 --> 00:56:25,089 [ CROAKS ] 926 00:56:25,170 --> 00:56:29,299 ♪ Oh, oh-oh-oh-oh ♪ 927 00:56:43,770 --> 00:56:45,729 Hey! 928 00:56:45,820 --> 00:56:49,989 ♪ - La-la, la-la, la-la-la-la ♪ ♪ - [ BOTH LAUGHING ] ♪ 929 00:56:50,070 --> 00:56:54,119 ♪ La-la, la-la, la-la ♪ 930 00:56:56,120 --> 00:56:58,039 There it is, Princess. 931 00:56:58,120 --> 00:57:00,459 Your future awaits you. 932 00:57:00,540 --> 00:57:02,789 - That's DuLoc? - Yeah, I know. 933 00:57:02,880 --> 00:57:05,549 You know, Shrek thinks Lord Farquaad's compensating for something, 934 00:57:05,630 --> 00:57:08,129 which I think means he has a really... Ow! 935 00:57:08,220 --> 00:57:10,129 Um, I, uh... 936 00:57:10,220 --> 00:57:12,639 - I guess we better move on. - Sure. 937 00:57:12,720 --> 00:57:14,809 But, Shrek? 938 00:57:14,890 --> 00:57:17,679 - I'm... I'm worried about Donkey. - [ BLUBBERING ] 939 00:57:17,770 --> 00:57:20,139 - What? - I mean, look at him. 940 00:57:20,230 --> 00:57:23,229 - He doesn't look so good. - What are you talking about? I'm fine. 941 00:57:23,310 --> 00:57:28,319 That's what they always say, and then next thing you know, you're on your back. 942 00:57:28,400 --> 00:57:30,859 - Dead. - You know, she's right. 943 00:57:30,950 --> 00:57:33,819 You look awful. Do you want to sit down? 944 00:57:33,910 --> 00:57:36,619 - I'll make you some tea. - I didn't want to say nothing, 945 00:57:36,699 --> 00:57:39,619 but I got this twinge in my neck, and when I turn my head like this, look. 946 00:57:39,640 --> 00:57:41,459 - [ BONES CRUNCH ] - Ow! See? 947 00:57:41,540 --> 00:57:44,140 - Who's hungry? I'll find us some dinner. - I'll get the firewood. 948 00:57:44,210 --> 00:57:48,709 Hey, where you going? Oh, man, I can't feel my toes! 949 00:57:48,800 --> 00:57:51,299 I don't have any toes! 950 00:57:51,380 --> 00:57:53,719 I think I need a hug. 951 00:57:57,260 --> 00:57:59,519 Mmm. 952 00:57:59,600 --> 00:58:03,559 Mmm. This is good. This is really good. 953 00:58:05,770 --> 00:58:08,029 - What is this? - Uh, weed rat. 954 00:58:08,110 --> 00:58:10,239 Rotisserie style. 955 00:58:10,320 --> 00:58:12,819 No kidding. 956 00:58:12,910 --> 00:58:14,819 Well, this is delicious. 957 00:58:14,910 --> 00:58:16,989 Well, they're also great in stews. 958 00:58:17,080 --> 00:58:21,329 Now, I don't mean to brag, but I make a mean weed rat stew. 959 00:58:21,410 --> 00:58:24,959 [ CHUCKLING ] 960 00:58:25,040 --> 00:58:29,169 [ SIGHS ] I guess I'll be dining a little differently tomorrow night. 961 00:58:29,250 --> 00:58:34,339 [ GULPS ] Maybe you can come visit me in the swamp sometime. 962 00:58:34,430 --> 00:58:36,599 I'll cook all kinds of stuff for you. 963 00:58:36,680 --> 00:58:40,559 Swamp toad soup, fish eye tartare... You name it. 964 00:58:40,640 --> 00:58:43,769 [ CHUCKLES ] I'd like that. 965 00:58:43,850 --> 00:58:47,229 [ SLURPS, LAUGHS ] 966 00:58:50,690 --> 00:58:53,899 ♪ See the pyramids ♪ ♪ along the Nile ♪ 967 00:58:53,990 --> 00:58:56,619 Um, Princess? 968 00:58:56,700 --> 00:59:00,949 ♪ - Watch the sun rise from a ♪ ♪ tropic isle - Yes, Shrek? ♪ 969 00:59:01,040 --> 00:59:04,869 ♪ - I, um, I was wondering. - Just ♪ ♪ remember, darling all the while ♪ 970 00:59:04,960 --> 00:59:07,209 Are you... 971 00:59:07,290 --> 00:59:09,879 ♪ You belong to me ♪ 972 00:59:09,960 --> 00:59:12,759 [ SIGHS ] Are you gonna eat that? 973 00:59:17,550 --> 00:59:19,469 [ CHUCKLES ] 974 00:59:19,560 --> 00:59:23,639 - Man, isn't this romantic? Just look at that sunset. - Sunset? 975 00:59:23,730 --> 00:59:26,269 Oh, no! I mean, it's late. 976 00:59:26,350 --> 00:59:28,229 - I-It's very late. - What? 977 00:59:28,310 --> 00:59:31,229 Wait a minute. I see what's going on here. 978 00:59:31,320 --> 00:59:34,279 - You're afraid of the dark, aren't you? - Yes! 979 00:59:34,360 --> 00:59:38,369 Yes, that's it. I'm terrified. You know, I'd better go inside. 980 00:59:38,450 --> 00:59:41,789 Don't feel bad, Princess. I used to be afraid of the dark, too, until... 981 00:59:41,870 --> 00:59:44,619 Hey, no, wait. I'm still afraid of the dark. 982 00:59:44,710 --> 00:59:47,879 - [ SHREK SIGHS ] - Good night. 983 00:59:47,960 --> 00:59:50,999 Good night. 984 00:59:51,090 --> 00:59:54,129 - [ DOOR CREAKS ] - [ DONKEY ] Ohh! 985 00:59:54,210 --> 00:59:56,969 Now I really see what's going on here. 986 00:59:57,050 --> 00:59:58,969 Oh, what are you talking about? 987 00:59:59,050 --> 01:00:01,809 I don't even wanna hear it. Look, I'm an animal, and I got instincts. 988 01:00:01,890 --> 01:00:04,309 I know you two were digging on each other. I could feel it. 989 01:00:04,390 --> 01:00:07,229 You're crazy. I'm just bringing her back to Farquaad. 990 01:00:07,310 --> 01:00:10,649 Oh, come on, Shrek. Wake up and smell the pheromones. 991 01:00:10,730 --> 01:00:13,399 - Just go on in and tell her how you feel. - I... 992 01:00:13,480 --> 01:00:17,489 There's nothing to tell. Besides, even if I did tell her that, 993 01:00:17,570 --> 01:00:19,489 well, you know... 994 01:00:19,570 --> 01:00:23,079 And I'm not saying I do 'cause I don't... 995 01:00:23,160 --> 01:00:25,579 She's a princess, and I'm... 996 01:00:25,660 --> 01:00:28,329 An ogre? 997 01:00:28,420 --> 01:00:31,079 Yeah. An ogre. 998 01:00:31,170 --> 01:00:35,209 - Hey, where you going? - To get... more firewood. 999 01:00:45,600 --> 01:00:47,679 [ SIGHS ] 1000 01:00:54,820 --> 01:00:56,149 Princess? 1001 01:00:56,240 --> 01:00:58,949 Princess Fiona? 1002 01:01:03,200 --> 01:01:06,039 Princess, where are you? 1003 01:01:06,120 --> 01:01:08,659 [ WINGS FLUTTERING ] 1004 01:01:11,290 --> 01:01:13,789 Princess? 1005 01:01:13,880 --> 01:01:16,799 - [ CREAKING ] - [ GASPS ] 1006 01:01:16,880 --> 01:01:19,629 It's very spooky in here. I am not playing no games. 1007 01:01:24,140 --> 01:01:25,889 [ SCREAMS ] 1008 01:01:29,850 --> 01:01:32,269 Aah! Oh, no! No, help! 1009 01:01:32,350 --> 01:01:35,439 - Shh! - Shrek! Shrek! Shrek! - No, it's okay. It's okay. 1010 01:01:35,520 --> 01:01:38,399 - What did you do with the princess? - Donkey, I'm the princess. 1011 01:01:38,490 --> 01:01:41,239 - Aah! - It's me, in this body. 1012 01:01:41,320 --> 01:01:43,869 Oh, my God! You ate the princess! 1013 01:01:43,950 --> 01:01:45,869 - Can you hear me? - Donkey! 1014 01:01:45,950 --> 01:01:48,289 - Listen, keep breathing! I'll get you out of there! - No! 1015 01:01:48,370 --> 01:01:50,829 - Shrek! Shrek! Shrek! - Shh. 1016 01:01:50,910 --> 01:01:52,749 - Shrek! - This is me. 1017 01:01:52,830 --> 01:01:54,749 [ MUFFLED MUMBLING ] 1018 01:01:57,880 --> 01:02:00,759 Princess? 1019 01:02:00,840 --> 01:02:04,339 What happened to you? You're, uh, uh, 1020 01:02:04,430 --> 01:02:06,349 uh, different. 1021 01:02:06,430 --> 01:02:08,679 - I'm ugly, okay? - Well, yeah! 1022 01:02:08,770 --> 01:02:11,889 Was it something you ate? 'Cause I told Shrek those rats was a bad idea. 1023 01:02:11,980 --> 01:02:14,519 - You are what you eat, I said. Now... - No. 1024 01:02:14,610 --> 01:02:17,939 I... I've been this way as lon as I can remember. 1025 01:02:18,029 --> 01:02:20,589 What do you mean? Look, I am not never seen you like this before. 1026 01:02:20,610 --> 01:02:23,779 It only happens when the sun goes down. 1027 01:02:25,160 --> 01:02:28,789 By night one way, by day another. 1028 01:02:28,870 --> 01:02:30,909 This shall be the norm... 1029 01:02:31,000 --> 01:02:34,119 until you find true love's first kiss... 1030 01:02:34,210 --> 01:02:38,629 and then take love's true form. 1031 01:02:38,710 --> 01:02:42,259 Ah, that's beautiful. I didn't know you wrote poetry. 1032 01:02:42,340 --> 01:02:44,259 It's a spell. 1033 01:02:44,340 --> 01:02:46,929 [ SIGHS ] When I was a little girl, 1034 01:02:47,010 --> 01:02:49,679 a witch cast a spell on me. 1035 01:02:49,770 --> 01:02:52,309 Every night I become this. 1036 01:02:52,390 --> 01:02:56,059 This horrible, ugly beast! 1037 01:02:58,570 --> 01:03:03,609 I was placed in a tower to await the day my true love would rescue me. 1038 01:03:03,700 --> 01:03:06,279 That's why I have to marry Lord Farquaad tomorrow... 1039 01:03:06,370 --> 01:03:09,789 before the sun sets and he sees me... 1040 01:03:11,040 --> 01:03:13,999 like this. [ SOBS ] 1041 01:03:14,080 --> 01:03:17,329 All right, all right. Calm down. Look, it's not that bad. 1042 01:03:17,420 --> 01:03:21,589 You're not that ugly. Well, I am not gonna lie. You are ugly. 1043 01:03:21,670 --> 01:03:24,679 But you only look like this at night. Shrek's ugly 24-7. 1044 01:03:24,760 --> 01:03:28,139 But, Donkey, I'm a princess, 1045 01:03:28,220 --> 01:03:31,809 and this is not how a princess is meant to look. 1046 01:03:31,890 --> 01:03:35,639 Princess, how 'bout if you don't marry Farquaad? 1047 01:03:35,730 --> 01:03:37,649 I have to. 1048 01:03:37,730 --> 01:03:40,569 Only my true love's kiss can break the spell. 1049 01:03:40,650 --> 01:03:44,189 But, you know, um, you're kind of an ogre, 1050 01:03:44,280 --> 01:03:47,699 and Shrek... well, you got a lot in common. 1051 01:03:47,780 --> 01:03:49,279 Shrek? 1052 01:03:49,370 --> 01:03:53,199 Princess, I... Uh, how's it going, first of all? 1053 01:03:53,290 --> 01:03:56,079 Good? Um, good for me too. 1054 01:03:56,170 --> 01:03:58,079 I'm okay. 1055 01:03:58,170 --> 01:04:03,049 I saw this flower and thought of you because it's pretty and... 1056 01:04:03,130 --> 01:04:07,379 Well, I don't really like it, but I thought you might like it 'cause you're pretty. 1057 01:04:07,470 --> 01:04:10,679 But I like you anyway. I'd... uh, uh... 1058 01:04:10,760 --> 01:04:12,759 [ SIGHS ] 1059 01:04:12,850 --> 01:04:16,389 I'm in trouble. Okay, here we go. 1060 01:04:16,480 --> 01:04:18,979 [ FIONA ] I can't just marry whoever want. 1061 01:04:19,060 --> 01:04:21,359 Take a good look at me, Donkey. 1062 01:04:21,440 --> 01:04:23,359 I mean, really, 1063 01:04:23,440 --> 01:04:26,109 who could ever love a beast so hideous and ugly? 1064 01:04:26,200 --> 01:04:28,609 Princess and ugly don't go together. 1065 01:04:28,700 --> 01:04:31,119 That's why I can't stay here with Shrek. [ GASPS ] 1066 01:04:31,200 --> 01:04:35,619 My only chance to live happily ever after is to marry my truelove. 1067 01:04:35,700 --> 01:04:39,119 - [ DEEP SIGH ] - Don't you see, Donkey? 1068 01:04:39,210 --> 01:04:42,499 That's just how it has to be. 1069 01:04:42,590 --> 01:04:45,629 It's the only way to break the spell. 1070 01:04:45,710 --> 01:04:48,469 - You at least gotta tell Shrek the truth. - No! 1071 01:04:48,550 --> 01:04:51,469 You can't breathe a word. No one must ever know. 1072 01:04:51,549 --> 01:04:54,109 What's the point of being able to talk if you gotta keep secrets? 1073 01:04:54,130 --> 01:04:56,889 Promise you won't tell. Promise! 1074 01:04:56,980 --> 01:05:00,059 All right, all right. I won't tell him. But you should. 1075 01:05:00,109 --> 01:05:03,229 I just know before this is over, I'm gonna need a whole lot of serious therapy. 1076 01:05:03,250 --> 01:05:06,799 - Look at my eye twitching. - [ DOOR OPENS ] 1077 01:05:25,880 --> 01:05:29,379 [ SNORING ] 1078 01:05:29,470 --> 01:05:33,219 [ FIONA ] I tell him, I tell him not. 1079 01:05:33,680 --> 01:05:37,679 I tell him, I tell him not. 1080 01:05:37,770 --> 01:05:39,689 I tell him. 1081 01:05:39,770 --> 01:05:41,849 Shrek! 1082 01:05:41,940 --> 01:05:44,479 Shrek, there's something I want... 1083 01:05:44,570 --> 01:05:47,569 [ SNORING ] 1084 01:06:05,290 --> 01:06:07,499 Shrek. 1085 01:06:08,920 --> 01:06:10,969 - Are you all right? - Perfect! 1086 01:06:11,050 --> 01:06:13,009 Never been better. 1087 01:06:13,090 --> 01:06:16,389 I... I don't... There's something I have to tell you. 1088 01:06:16,470 --> 01:06:19,019 You don't have to tell me anything, Princess. 1089 01:06:19,100 --> 01:06:21,189 - I heard enough last night. - You heard what I said? 1090 01:06:21,270 --> 01:06:23,189 Every word. 1091 01:06:23,270 --> 01:06:25,439 I thought you'd understand. 1092 01:06:25,520 --> 01:06:27,439 Oh, I understand. 1093 01:06:27,520 --> 01:06:31,109 Like you said, Who could love a hideous, ugly beast? 1094 01:06:31,200 --> 01:06:33,859 But I thought that wouldn't matter to you. 1095 01:06:33,950 --> 01:06:35,699 Yeah? Well, it does. 1096 01:06:35,780 --> 01:06:38,199 [ GASPS, SIGHS ] 1097 01:06:38,290 --> 01:06:40,499 - Ah, right on time. - [ HORSE WHINNIES ] 1098 01:06:40,580 --> 01:06:43,459 Princess, I've brought you a little something. 1099 01:06:43,540 --> 01:06:47,789 ♪ [ FANFARE ] ♪ 1100 01:06:47,880 --> 01:06:51,549 [ YAWNS ] What'd I miss? What'd I miss? 1101 01:06:51,630 --> 01:06:54,259 [ MUFFLED ] Who said that? Couldn't have been a donkey. 1102 01:06:55,640 --> 01:06:58,099 Princess Fiona. 1103 01:06:58,180 --> 01:07:00,889 As promised. Now hand it over. 1104 01:07:00,970 --> 01:07:05,229 Very well, ogre. The deed to your swamp, cleared out, as agreed. 1105 01:07:05,310 --> 01:07:09,859 Take it and go before I change my mind. 1106 01:07:09,940 --> 01:07:12,779 Forgive me, Princess, for startling you, 1107 01:07:12,860 --> 01:07:14,779 but you startled me, 1108 01:07:14,860 --> 01:07:18,529 for I have never seen such a radiant beauty before. 1109 01:07:18,620 --> 01:07:21,619 I am Lord Farquaad. 1110 01:07:21,700 --> 01:07:25,579 Lord Farquaad? Oh, no, no. 1111 01:07:25,670 --> 01:07:28,629 [ SNAPS FINGERS ] - Forgive me, my Lord, for I was just saying... 1112 01:07:28,710 --> 01:07:34,169 a short... farewell. 1113 01:07:34,260 --> 01:07:38,889 That is so sweet. You don't have to waste good manners on the ogre. 1114 01:07:38,970 --> 01:07:40,889 It's not like it has feelings. 1115 01:07:40,970 --> 01:07:44,939 No, you're right. It doesn't. 1116 01:07:45,020 --> 01:07:49,019 Princess Fiona, beautiful, fair, flawless Fiona. 1117 01:07:49,110 --> 01:07:52,109 - I ask your hand in marriage. - [ GASPS ] 1118 01:07:52,190 --> 01:07:57,239 Will you be the perfect bride for the perfect groom? 1119 01:08:00,530 --> 01:08:05,709 Lord Farquaad, I accept. Nothing would make... 1120 01:08:05,790 --> 01:08:08,959 Excellent! I'll start the plans, for tomorrow we wed! 1121 01:08:09,040 --> 01:08:10,959 No! I mean, uh, 1122 01:08:11,040 --> 01:08:13,419 why wait? 1123 01:08:13,510 --> 01:08:17,339 Let's get married today before the sun sets. 1124 01:08:17,430 --> 01:08:20,139 Oh, anxious, are we? You're right. 1125 01:08:20,220 --> 01:08:24,139 The sooner, the better. There's so much to do! 1126 01:08:24,220 --> 01:08:26,559 There's the caterer, the cake, the band, the guest list. 1127 01:08:26,640 --> 01:08:29,649 Captain, round up some guests! 1128 01:08:29,730 --> 01:08:32,439 [ FIONA ] Fare-thee-well, ogre. 1129 01:08:32,520 --> 01:08:35,109 Shrek, what are you doing? You're letting her get away. 1130 01:08:35,190 --> 01:08:37,910 - Yeah? So what? - Shrek, there's something about her you don't know. 1131 01:08:37,990 --> 01:08:40,409 Look, I talked to her last night. She's... 1132 01:08:40,490 --> 01:08:44,539 I know you talked to her last night. You're great pals, aren't ta? 1133 01:08:44,620 --> 01:08:48,369 Now, if you two are such good friends, why don't you follow her home? 1134 01:08:48,460 --> 01:08:50,419 Shrek, I... I wanna go with you. 1135 01:08:50,500 --> 01:08:53,459 I told you, didn't I? You're not coming home with me. 1136 01:08:53,550 --> 01:08:57,509 I live alone! My swamp! Me! Nobody else! 1137 01:08:57,590 --> 01:08:59,679 Understand? Nobody! 1138 01:08:59,760 --> 01:09:04,599 Especially useless, pathetic, annoying, talking donkeys! 1139 01:09:04,680 --> 01:09:07,849 - But I thought... - Yeah. You know what? 1140 01:09:07,940 --> 01:09:10,149 You thought wrong! 1141 01:09:11,900 --> 01:09:13,819 Shrek. 1142 01:09:19,610 --> 01:09:23,619 ♪ I heard there was ♪ ♪ a secret chord ♪ 1143 01:09:23,700 --> 01:09:26,749 ♪ That David played ♪ ♪ and it pleased the Lord ♪ 1144 01:09:26,830 --> 01:09:31,669 ♪ But you don't really ♪ ♪ care for music, do ta ♪ 1145 01:09:33,420 --> 01:09:36,759 ♪ It goes like this ♪ ♪ the fourth, the fifth ♪ 1146 01:09:36,840 --> 01:09:39,379 ♪ The minor fall ♪ ♪ the major lift ♪ 1147 01:09:39,470 --> 01:09:46,099 ♪ The baffled king ♪ ♪ composing hallelujah ♪ 1148 01:09:46,180 --> 01:09:49,429 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1149 01:09:49,520 --> 01:09:52,939 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1150 01:09:53,020 --> 01:09:56,939 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1151 01:09:57,030 --> 01:10:01,779 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1152 01:10:03,700 --> 01:10:07,199 ♪ Baby, I've been here before ♪ 1153 01:10:07,290 --> 01:10:10,409 ♪ I know this room ♪ ♪ I've walked this floor ♪ 1154 01:10:10,500 --> 01:10:15,589 ♪ I used to live alone ♪ ♪ before I knew you ♪ 1155 01:10:17,300 --> 01:10:20,379 ♪ I've seen your flag ♪ ♪ on the marble arch ♪ 1156 01:10:20,470 --> 01:10:23,799 ♪ But love is not ♪ ♪ a victory march ♪ 1157 01:10:23,890 --> 01:10:28,309 ♪ It's a cold ♪ ♪ and it's a broken hallelujah ♪ 1158 01:10:29,930 --> 01:10:33,059 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1159 01:10:33,150 --> 01:10:36,269 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1160 01:10:36,360 --> 01:10:39,399 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1161 01:10:39,480 --> 01:10:44,989 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1162 01:10:46,740 --> 01:10:50,579 ♪ And all I ever ♪ ♪ learned from love ♪ 1163 01:10:50,660 --> 01:10:53,039 ♪ I show to shoot at someone ♪ 1164 01:10:53,120 --> 01:10:55,709 ♪ - Who outdrew you ♪ ♪ - [ MOANING ] ♪ 1165 01:10:55,790 --> 01:10:59,509 ♪ And it's not a cry ♪ ♪ you can hear at night ♪ 1166 01:10:59,590 --> 01:11:02,629 ♪ It's not somebody ♪ ♪ who's seen the light ♪ 1167 01:11:02,720 --> 01:11:09,769 ♪ - It's a cold and it's a ♪ ♪ broken hallelujah - [ MOANING ] ♪ 1168 01:11:09,850 --> 01:11:12,639 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1169 01:11:12,730 --> 01:11:15,979 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1170 01:11:16,060 --> 01:11:19,319 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1171 01:11:19,400 --> 01:11:25,989 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 1172 01:11:29,580 --> 01:11:32,579 [ THUMPING SOUND ] 1173 01:11:34,290 --> 01:11:36,289 Donkey? 1174 01:11:36,380 --> 01:11:38,589 - [ GRUNTS ] - What are you doing? 1175 01:11:38,670 --> 01:11:41,629 I would think, of all people, you would recognise a wall when you see one. 1176 01:11:41,710 --> 01:11:43,629 Well, yeah. 1177 01:11:43,720 --> 01:11:47,089 But the wall's supposed to go around my swamp, not through it. 1178 01:11:47,180 --> 01:11:49,969 It is around your half. See, that's your half, and this is my half. 1179 01:11:50,060 --> 01:11:52,639 Oh! Your half. Hmm. 1180 01:11:52,720 --> 01:11:55,269 Yes, my half. I helped rescue the princess. 1181 01:11:55,350 --> 01:11:57,599 I did half the work, I get half the booty. 1182 01:11:57,690 --> 01:12:01,019 Now hand me that big old rock, the one that looks like your head. 1183 01:12:01,110 --> 01:12:03,439 - Back off! - No, you back off. 1184 01:12:03,530 --> 01:12:05,529 - This is my swamp! - Our swamp. 1185 01:12:05,610 --> 01:12:07,529 - Let go, Donkey! - You let go. 1186 01:12:07,610 --> 01:12:09,579 - Stubborn jackass! - Smelly ogre. 1187 01:12:09,660 --> 01:12:11,869 Fine! 1188 01:12:11,950 --> 01:12:15,289 - Hey, come back here. I'm not through with you yet. - Well, I'm through with you. 1189 01:12:15,370 --> 01:12:18,629 Uh-uh. You know, with you it's always, Me, me, me! 1190 01:12:18,710 --> 01:12:21,299 Well, guess what! Now it's my turn! 1191 01:12:21,380 --> 01:12:23,509 So you just shut up and pay attention! 1192 01:12:23,590 --> 01:12:25,549 You are mean to me. 1193 01:12:25,630 --> 01:12:28,139 You insult me and you don't appreciate anything that I do! 1194 01:12:28,220 --> 01:12:31,309 You're always pushing me around or pushing me away. 1195 01:12:31,390 --> 01:12:35,229 Oh, yeah? Well, if I treated you so bad, how come you came back? 1196 01:12:35,310 --> 01:12:38,519 Because that's what friends do! They forgive each other! 1197 01:12:38,600 --> 01:12:41,819 Oh, yeah. You're right, Donkey. 1198 01:12:41,900 --> 01:12:46,109 I forgive you... for stabbing me in the back! 1199 01:12:46,200 --> 01:12:51,619 Ohh! You're so wrapped up in layers, onion boy, you're afraid of your own feelings. 1200 01:12:51,700 --> 01:12:55,159 - Go away! - There you are, doing it again just like you did to Fiona. 1201 01:12:55,250 --> 01:12:57,829 All she ever do was like you, maybe even love you. 1202 01:12:57,920 --> 01:13:02,039 Love me? She said I was ugly, a hideous creature. 1203 01:13:02,130 --> 01:13:04,049 I heard the two of you talking. 1204 01:13:04,130 --> 01:13:06,049 She wasn't talking about you. 1205 01:13:06,130 --> 01:13:08,469 She was talking about, uh, somebody else. 1206 01:13:11,010 --> 01:13:13,429 She wasn't talking about me? 1207 01:13:13,510 --> 01:13:15,809 Well, then who was she talking about? 1208 01:13:15,890 --> 01:13:18,651 Uh-uh, no way. I am not saying anything. You don't wanna listen to me. 1209 01:13:18,690 --> 01:13:20,979 - Right? Right? - Donkey! 1210 01:13:21,060 --> 01:13:23,609 - No! - Okay, look. 1211 01:13:23,690 --> 01:13:25,609 I'm sorry, all right? 1212 01:13:27,240 --> 01:13:29,149 Humph. 1213 01:13:30,490 --> 01:13:34,119 [ SIGHS ] I'm sorry. 1214 01:13:34,200 --> 01:13:38,459 I guess I am just a big, stupid, ugly ogre. 1215 01:13:39,670 --> 01:13:41,629 Can you forgive me? 1216 01:13:43,840 --> 01:13:45,749 Hey, that's what friends are for, right? 1217 01:13:45,840 --> 01:13:48,509 Right. Friends? 1218 01:13:48,590 --> 01:13:50,509 Friends. 1219 01:13:50,590 --> 01:13:53,549 So, um, 1220 01:13:53,640 --> 01:13:55,889 what did Fiona say about me? 1221 01:13:55,970 --> 01:13:59,099 What are you asking me for? Why don't you just go ask her? 1222 01:13:59,180 --> 01:14:02,189 The wedding! We'll never make it in time. 1223 01:14:02,270 --> 01:14:05,479 Ha-ha-ha! Never fear, for where there's a will, there's a way, 1224 01:14:05,570 --> 01:14:07,689 and I have a way. [ WHISTLES ] 1225 01:14:12,070 --> 01:14:14,529 - Donkey? - [ DONKEY LAUGHING ] 1226 01:14:14,620 --> 01:14:16,989 I guess it's just my animal magnetism. 1227 01:14:17,080 --> 01:14:20,249 [ LAUGHING ] Aw, come here, you. 1228 01:14:20,330 --> 01:14:23,129 All right, all right. Don't get all slobbery. No one likes a kiss ass. 1229 01:14:23,210 --> 01:14:25,749 All right, hop on and hold on tight. 1230 01:14:25,840 --> 01:14:29,339 I haven't had a chance to install the seat belts yet. 1231 01:14:35,760 --> 01:14:38,269 [ DONKEY LAUGHING ] Whoo! 1232 01:14:51,780 --> 01:14:55,659 [ BELLS TOLLING ] 1233 01:14:58,790 --> 01:15:00,909 [ ALL GASPING ] 1234 01:15:01,000 --> 01:15:03,539 People of DuLoc, 1235 01:15:03,620 --> 01:15:06,289 we gather here today... 1236 01:15:06,380 --> 01:15:08,419 to bear witness... 1237 01:15:08,500 --> 01:15:10,419 - to the union... - Um... 1238 01:15:10,510 --> 01:15:12,969 - Of our new king... - Excuse me. 1239 01:15:13,050 --> 01:15:15,719 - Could we just skip ahead to the I do's? - [ CHUCKLING ] 1240 01:15:15,800 --> 01:15:17,719 Go on. 1241 01:15:22,770 --> 01:15:26,399 Go ahead, have some fun. If we need you, I'll whistle. How about that? 1242 01:15:29,020 --> 01:15:30,939 Shrek, wait, wait! Wait a minute! 1243 01:15:31,030 --> 01:15:33,699 - You wanna do this right, don't you? - What are you talking about? 1244 01:15:33,780 --> 01:15:35,699 There's a line you gotta wait for. 1245 01:15:35,780 --> 01:15:38,279 The preacher's gonna say, Speak now or forever hold your peace. 1246 01:15:38,370 --> 01:15:42,119 - That's when you say, I object! - I don't have time for this! 1247 01:15:42,200 --> 01:15:43,909 Wait. What are you doing? Listen to me! 1248 01:15:44,000 --> 01:15:45,919 - Look, you love this woman, don't you? - Yes. 1249 01:15:46,000 --> 01:15:47,289 - You wanna hold her? - Yes. 1250 01:15:47,380 --> 01:15:49,589 - Please her? - Yes! 1251 01:15:49,670 --> 01:15:52,299 ♪ Then you got to, got to ♪ ♪ try a little tenderness ♪ 1252 01:15:52,380 --> 01:15:55,129 - The chicks love that romantic crap! - All right! Cut it out. 1253 01:15:55,220 --> 01:15:58,849 - When does this guy say the line? - We gotta check it out. 1254 01:15:58,930 --> 01:16:02,099 - [ DONKEY GRUNTING ] - And so, by the power vested in me, 1255 01:16:02,180 --> 01:16:05,439 - [ SHREK ] What do you see? - The whole town's in there. 1256 01:16:05,520 --> 01:16:08,649 - I now pronounce you husband and wife, - They're at the altar. 1257 01:16:08,730 --> 01:16:11,279 - King and queen. - Mother Fletcher! He already said it. 1258 01:16:11,360 --> 01:16:13,989 - Oh, for the love of Pete! - [ GRUNTS ] 1259 01:16:15,240 --> 01:16:17,279 I object! 1260 01:16:17,360 --> 01:16:19,449 - Shrek? - [ GASPS ] 1261 01:16:19,530 --> 01:16:21,449 Oh, now what does he want? 1262 01:16:21,540 --> 01:16:24,959 [ CROWD CLAMOURING ] 1263 01:16:25,040 --> 01:16:28,079 Hi, everyone. Having a good time, are ta? 1264 01:16:28,170 --> 01:16:30,379 I love DuLoc, first of all. 1265 01:16:30,460 --> 01:16:32,959 - Very clean. - What are you doing here? 1266 01:16:33,050 --> 01:16:35,969 Really, it's rude enough being alive when no one wants you, 1267 01:16:36,050 --> 01:16:39,389 - but showing up uninvited to a wedding... - Fiona! 1268 01:16:39,470 --> 01:16:42,469 - I need to talk to you. - Oh, now you wanna talk? 1269 01:16:42,560 --> 01:16:45,519 It's a little late for that, so if you'll excuse me... 1270 01:16:45,600 --> 01:16:47,979 - But you can't marry him. - And why not? 1271 01:16:48,060 --> 01:16:51,939 Because... Because he's just marrying you so he can be king. 1272 01:16:52,020 --> 01:16:54,399 Outrageous! Fiona, don't listen to him. 1273 01:16:54,480 --> 01:16:58,109 - He's not your true love. - And what do you know about true love? 1274 01:16:58,200 --> 01:17:00,569 Well, I... Uh... 1275 01:17:00,660 --> 01:17:04,039 - I mean... - Oh, this is precious. 1276 01:17:04,120 --> 01:17:08,789 [ CHUCKLING ] The ogre has fallen in love with the princess! 1277 01:17:08,870 --> 01:17:11,129 - Oh, good Lord. - [ CROWD LAUGHING ] 1278 01:17:11,210 --> 01:17:13,129 An ogre and a princess! 1279 01:17:13,210 --> 01:17:16,469 [ LAUGHING CONTINUES ] 1280 01:17:18,760 --> 01:17:21,259 Shrek, is this true? 1281 01:17:22,680 --> 01:17:25,219 Who cares? It's preposterous! 1282 01:17:25,310 --> 01:17:28,939 Fiona, my love, we're but a kiss away from our happily ever after. 1283 01:17:29,020 --> 01:17:31,609 Now kiss me! Mmmm! 1284 01:17:35,690 --> 01:17:39,029 By night one way, by day another. 1285 01:17:40,950 --> 01:17:43,699 I wanted to show you before. 1286 01:18:02,590 --> 01:18:06,179 - [ WHIMPERS ] - [ CROWD GASPING ] 1287 01:18:06,270 --> 01:18:08,809 Well, uh, 1288 01:18:08,890 --> 01:18:10,889 that explains a lot. 1289 01:18:10,980 --> 01:18:14,649 [ FARQUAAD ] Ugh! It's disgusting! 1290 01:18:14,730 --> 01:18:16,779 Guards! Guards! 1291 01:18:16,860 --> 01:18:20,029 I order you to get that out of my sight now! Get them! 1292 01:18:20,110 --> 01:18:22,909 - Get them both! - No, no! 1293 01:18:22,990 --> 01:18:26,739 This hocus-pocus alters nothing. This marriage is binding, and that makes me king! 1294 01:18:26,830 --> 01:18:29,119 - See? See? - No, let go of me! Shrek! 1295 01:18:29,159 --> 01:18:31,279 No! - [ FARQUAAD ] Don't just stand there, you morons. 1296 01:18:31,300 --> 01:18:33,839 Get out of my way! Fiona! 1297 01:18:36,210 --> 01:18:38,709 Arrgh! 1298 01:18:38,800 --> 01:18:41,799 I'll make you regret the day we met. I'll see you drawn and quartered! 1299 01:18:41,880 --> 01:18:44,799 - You'll beg for death to save you! - No! Shrek! 1300 01:18:44,890 --> 01:18:48,389 - And as for you, my wife, - Fiona! 1301 01:18:48,470 --> 01:18:51,139 I'll have you locked back in that tower for the rest of your days! 1302 01:18:51,230 --> 01:18:53,059 - I am king! - [ WHISTLES ] 1303 01:18:53,150 --> 01:18:56,939 I will have order! I will have perfection! I will have... 1304 01:18:58,230 --> 01:19:01,279 Aaah! 1305 01:19:01,360 --> 01:19:04,109 - Aah! - All right. Nobody move. 1306 01:19:04,200 --> 01:19:06,279 I got a dragon here, and I'm not afraid to use it. 1307 01:19:06,370 --> 01:19:08,989 - [ DRAGON ROARS ] - I'm a donkey on the edge! 1308 01:19:10,410 --> 01:19:13,579 - [ BELCHES ] - [ DONKEY LAUGHS ] 1309 01:19:13,670 --> 01:19:16,079 Celebrity marriages. They never last, do they? 1310 01:19:16,170 --> 01:19:18,169 [ CHEERING ] 1311 01:19:18,250 --> 01:19:20,089 Go ahead, Shrek. 1312 01:19:21,470 --> 01:19:23,759 Uh, Fiona? 1313 01:19:24,890 --> 01:19:27,099 Yes, Shrek? 1314 01:19:27,180 --> 01:19:31,229 I... I love you. 1315 01:19:31,310 --> 01:19:33,559 Really? 1316 01:19:34,650 --> 01:19:37,649 Really, really. 1317 01:19:37,730 --> 01:19:39,649 I love you too. 1318 01:19:45,110 --> 01:19:46,779 [ ALL ] Aawww! 1319 01:19:48,700 --> 01:19:51,949 [ FIONA'S VOICE ] Until you find truelove's first kiss... 1320 01:19:52,040 --> 01:19:55,329 [ ECHOING ] and then take love's true form. 1321 01:20:18,900 --> 01:20:21,819 [ ECHOING CONTINUES ] Take love's true form. Take love's true form. 1322 01:20:27,990 --> 01:20:30,489 Fiona? 1323 01:20:33,000 --> 01:20:35,579 Fiona. 1324 01:20:35,660 --> 01:20:38,209 Are you all right? 1325 01:20:38,290 --> 01:20:40,209 Well, yes. 1326 01:20:40,290 --> 01:20:43,549 But I don't understand. 1327 01:20:43,630 --> 01:20:45,759 I'm supposed to be beautiful. 1328 01:20:48,470 --> 01:20:50,719 But you are beautiful. 1329 01:20:50,800 --> 01:20:53,019 [ CHUCKLES ] 1330 01:20:53,270 --> 01:20:55,729 I was hoping this would be a happy ending. 1331 01:20:59,520 --> 01:21:03,939 ♪ I thought love was only true ♪ ♪ in fairy tales ♪ 1332 01:21:04,030 --> 01:21:05,489 [ ALL ] Oy! 1333 01:21:05,570 --> 01:21:09,279 ♪ Meant for someone else ♪ ♪ but not for me ♪ 1334 01:21:11,700 --> 01:21:14,659 ♪ Love was out to get me ♪ 1335 01:21:14,750 --> 01:21:17,539 ♪ That's the way it seemed ♪ 1336 01:21:17,620 --> 01:21:22,089 ♪ Disappointment ♪ ♪ haunted all my dreams ♪ 1337 01:21:22,170 --> 01:21:25,459 ♪ And then I saw her face ♪ 1338 01:21:25,550 --> 01:21:28,339 ♪ Now I'm a believer ♪ 1339 01:21:28,430 --> 01:21:30,969 ♪ And not a trace ♪ 1340 01:21:31,050 --> 01:21:33,809 ♪ Of doubt in my mind ♪ 1341 01:21:33,890 --> 01:21:37,939 ♪ - I'm in love ♪ ♪ - Ooh-ahh ♪ 1342 01:21:38,020 --> 01:21:40,479 ♪ I'm a believer ♪ ♪ I couldn't leave her ♪ 1343 01:21:40,560 --> 01:21:42,769 ♪ If I tried ♪ 1344 01:21:42,860 --> 01:21:46,899 God bless us, every one. 1345 01:21:46,990 --> 01:21:50,529 ♪ Come on, y'all! ♪ ♪ Then I saw her face Ha-ha! ♪ 1346 01:21:50,610 --> 01:21:53,739 ♪ Now I'm a believer ♪ ♪ Listen! ♪ 1347 01:21:53,830 --> 01:21:56,619 ♪ Not a trace ♪ 1348 01:21:56,700 --> 01:21:59,499 ♪ Of doubt in my mind ♪ 1349 01:21:59,580 --> 01:22:02,839 ♪ I'm in love ♪ ♪ Ooh-ahh ♪ 1350 01:22:02,920 --> 01:22:07,169 ♪ I'm a believer ♪ ♪ I couldn't leave her if I tried ♪ 1351 01:22:07,260 --> 01:22:10,129 - Ooh! - Uh! 1352 01:22:10,220 --> 01:22:12,799 ♪ Then I saw her face ♪ 1353 01:22:12,890 --> 01:22:15,849 ♪ Now I'm a believer ♪ ♪ Hey! ♪ 1354 01:22:15,930 --> 01:22:18,729 ♪ Not a trace ♪ ♪ Uhh! Yeah. ♪ 1355 01:22:18,810 --> 01:22:22,059 ♪ Of doubt in my mind ♪ ♪ One more time! ♪ 1356 01:22:22,150 --> 01:22:26,689 ♪ I'm in love ♪ ♪ I'm a believer ♪ 1357 01:22:26,780 --> 01:22:28,609 Come on! 1358 01:22:28,690 --> 01:22:30,610 ♪ I believe, I believe ♪ ♪ I believe, I believe ♪ 1359 01:22:30,700 --> 01:22:33,369 ♪ I believe, I believe ♪ ♪ I believe, I believe, I believe, hey ♪ 1360 01:22:33,450 --> 01:22:36,029 ♪ Y'all sing it with me! ♪ ♪ I ♪ 1361 01:22:36,120 --> 01:22:37,789 ♪ Believe ♪ 1362 01:22:37,870 --> 01:22:40,829 ♪ I believe ♪ ♪ People in the back! ♪ 1363 01:22:40,910 --> 01:22:43,829 ♪ - I believe ♪ ♪ - I'm a believer ♪ 1364 01:22:43,920 --> 01:22:46,879 ♪ I believe ♪ 1365 01:22:46,960 --> 01:22:49,839 ♪ I believe ♪ 1366 01:22:49,920 --> 01:22:54,339 ♪ I believe ♪ 1367 01:22:54,430 --> 01:22:56,679 [ HYSTERICAL LAUGHING ] 1368 01:22:56,760 --> 01:22:59,019 Oh, that's funny. Oh. Oh. 1369 01:22:59,100 --> 01:23:01,729 I can't breathe. I can't breathe. 1370 01:23:02,640 --> 01:23:04,939 ♪ I believe in self-assertion ♪ 1371 01:23:05,020 --> 01:23:07,189 ♪ Destiny or ♪ ♪ as light diversion ♪ 1372 01:23:07,270 --> 01:23:11,569 ♪ Now it seems ♪ ♪ I've got my head on straight ♪ 1373 01:23:11,650 --> 01:23:13,779 ♪ I'm a freak ♪ ♪ an apparition ♪ 1374 01:23:13,860 --> 01:23:15,989 ♪ Seems I've made ♪ ♪ the right decision ♪ 1375 01:23:16,070 --> 01:23:19,699 ♪ To try to turn back now ♪ ♪ it might be too late ♪ 1376 01:23:19,790 --> 01:23:24,119 ♪ - I want to stay home today ♪ ♪ - Don't wanna go out ♪ 1377 01:23:24,210 --> 01:23:28,549 ♪ - If anyone comes to play ♪ ♪ - Gonna get thrown out ♪ 1378 01:23:28,630 --> 01:23:32,969 ♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪ ♪ - Don't want no company ♪ 1379 01:23:33,050 --> 01:23:35,509 ♪ No way ♪ 1380 01:23:35,590 --> 01:23:38,259 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1381 01:23:38,350 --> 01:23:40,559 ♪ I wanna be a millionaire ♪ ♪ some day ♪ 1382 01:23:40,640 --> 01:23:42,809 ♪ But know what it feels like ♪ ♪ to give it away ♪ 1383 01:23:42,890 --> 01:23:46,309 ♪ Watch me march ♪ ♪ to the beat of my own drum ♪ 1384 01:23:46,400 --> 01:23:48,979 ♪ And it's off to the moon ♪ ♪ and then back again ♪ 1385 01:23:49,070 --> 01:23:51,149 ♪ Same old day ♪ ♪ Same situation ♪ 1386 01:23:51,240 --> 01:23:55,409 ♪ My happiness rears back ♪ ♪ as if to say ♪ 1387 01:23:55,490 --> 01:23:59,789 ♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪ ♪ - Don't wanna go out ♪ 1388 01:23:59,870 --> 01:24:04,249 ♪ - If anyone comes my way ♪ ♪ - Gonna get thrown out ♪ 1389 01:24:04,330 --> 01:24:08,749 ♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪ ♪ - Don't want no company ♪ 1390 01:24:08,840 --> 01:24:11,299 ♪ No way ♪ 1391 01:24:11,380 --> 01:24:14,009 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1392 01:24:17,850 --> 01:24:22,679 ♪ I wanna stay home ♪ ♪ stay home, stay home ♪ 1393 01:24:22,770 --> 01:24:27,809 ♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪ ♪ - Don't wanna go out ♪ 1394 01:24:27,900 --> 01:24:32,189 ♪ - If anyone comes to play ♪ ♪ - Gonna get thrown out ♪ 1395 01:24:32,280 --> 01:24:35,109 ♪ I wanna stay home today ♪ 1396 01:24:35,200 --> 01:24:39,199 ♪ Don't want no company ♪ ♪ No way ♪ 1397 01:24:39,280 --> 01:24:42,119 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1398 01:24:55,920 --> 01:24:59,889 ♪ I get such a thrill ♪ ♪ when you looking my eyes ♪ 1399 01:24:59,970 --> 01:25:04,139 ♪ My heart skips a beat ♪ ♪ Girl, I feel so alive ♪ 1400 01:25:04,220 --> 01:25:07,979 ♪ Please tell me, baby ♪ ♪ if all this is true ♪ 1401 01:25:08,060 --> 01:25:12,149 ♪ 'Cause deep down inside ♪ ♪ all I wanted was you ♪ 1402 01:25:12,230 --> 01:25:16,149 ♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪ ♪ Makes me wanna dance ♪ 1403 01:25:16,240 --> 01:25:20,119 ♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪ ♪ It's a new romance ♪ 1404 01:25:20,200 --> 01:25:24,159 ♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪ ♪ I look into your eyes ♪ 1405 01:25:24,240 --> 01:25:28,119 ♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪ ♪ The best years of our lives ♪ 1406 01:25:28,210 --> 01:25:31,999 ♪ When we first met ♪ ♪ I could hardly believe ♪ 1407 01:25:32,090 --> 01:25:36,049 ♪ The things that would happen ♪ ♪ and we could achieve ♪ 1408 01:25:36,130 --> 01:25:39,839 ♪ So let's be together ♪ ♪ for all of our time ♪ 1409 01:25:39,930 --> 01:25:43,809 ♪ Oh, girl, I'm so thankful ♪ ♪ that you are still mine ♪ 1410 01:25:43,890 --> 01:25:45,969 ♪ You always consider me ♪ ♪ like an ugly duckling ♪ 1411 01:25:46,060 --> 01:25:48,576 ♪ And treat me like a Nostradamus ♪ ♪ was why I had to get my shine on ♪ 1412 01:25:48,600 --> 01:25:50,680 ♪ I break a little something ♪ ♪ to keep my mind on ♪ 1413 01:25:50,730 --> 01:25:53,149 ♪ 'Cause you had my mind gone ♪ ♪ Eh-eh, eh-eh, eh-eh ♪ 1414 01:25:53,230 --> 01:25:56,069 ♪ Turn the lights on, Come on, baby ♪ ♪ Let's just rewind the song ♪ 1415 01:25:56,149 --> 01:25:58,869 ♪ 'Cause all I want to do is ♪ ♪ make the rest years the best years ♪ 1416 01:25:58,890 --> 01:26:00,359 ♪ All night long ♪ 1417 01:26:00,450 --> 01:26:04,159 ♪ - Oh-oh-oh, makes me wanna dance ♪ ♪ - Makes me wanna dance ♪ 1418 01:26:04,240 --> 01:26:08,159 ♪ - Oh-oh-oh, it's a new romance ♪ ♪ - It's a new romance ♪ 1419 01:26:08,250 --> 01:26:11,419 ♪ - Oh-oh-oh, I look into your eyes ♪ ♪ - Oh, yeah, yeah ♪ 1420 01:26:11,500 --> 01:26:14,169 ♪ - Look into your eyes ♪ ♪ - Oh-oh-oh ♪ 1421 01:26:14,250 --> 01:26:16,769 ♪ - The best years of our lives ♪ ♪ - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1422 01:26:16,790 --> 01:26:20,179 ♪ - Oh-oh-oh, makes me wanna dance ♪ ♪ - Whoa-oh-oh, dance, yeah ♪ 1423 01:26:20,260 --> 01:26:24,179 ♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪ ♪ It's a new romance ♪ 1424 01:26:24,260 --> 01:26:28,229 ♪ - Oh-oh-oh, I look into your eyes ♪ ♪ - Look into your eyes, yeah ♪ 1425 01:26:28,310 --> 01:26:32,939 ♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪ ♪ The best years of our lives ♪ 1426 01:26:33,020 --> 01:26:35,859 ♪ Everything looks bright ♪ 1427 01:26:35,940 --> 01:26:38,189 ♪ Standing in your light ♪ 1428 01:26:38,280 --> 01:26:40,609 ♪ Everything feels right ♪ 1429 01:26:40,700 --> 01:26:43,779 ♪ What's left is out of sight ♪ 1430 01:26:43,870 --> 01:26:48,449 ♪ What's a girl to do I'm ♪ ♪ telling you You're on my mind ♪ 1431 01:26:48,540 --> 01:26:51,119 ♪ I wanna be with you ♪ 1432 01:26:51,210 --> 01:26:53,499 ♪ 'Cause when you're ♪ ♪ standing next to me ♪ 1433 01:26:53,580 --> 01:26:55,499 ♪ It's like wow ♪ 1434 01:26:55,590 --> 01:26:58,709 ♪ And all your kisses ♪ ♪ seem to set me free ♪ 1435 01:26:58,800 --> 01:27:00,629 ♪ It's like wow ♪ 1436 01:27:00,720 --> 01:27:04,049 ♪ And when we touch it's such ♪ ♪ a rush I can't get enough ♪ 1437 01:27:04,140 --> 01:27:06,809 ♪ It's like... It's like ♪ ♪ Ooh-ooh ♪ 1438 01:27:06,890 --> 01:27:09,429 ♪ Hey, what ♪ 1439 01:27:09,520 --> 01:27:12,809 ♪ It's like wow ♪ ♪ Ooh-ooh, hey ♪ 1440 01:27:12,900 --> 01:27:16,149 ♪ Hey, yeah ♪ ♪ It's like wow ♪ 1441 01:27:16,230 --> 01:27:19,859 ♪ Everything is looking ♪ ♪ right now, right now ♪ 1442 01:27:19,940 --> 01:27:23,159 ♪ - It's like wow ♪ ♪ - And I got this feeling ♪ 1443 01:27:23,240 --> 01:27:26,119 ♪ This feeling ♪ ♪ it's just like wow ♪ 1444 01:27:26,200 --> 01:27:28,449 ♪ It's just like wow ♪ 1445 01:27:28,540 --> 01:27:30,499 ♪ - You are all I'm thinking of. ♪ ♪ - Like wow ♪ 1446 01:27:30,580 --> 01:27:34,959 ♪ Everything feels right ♪ ♪ Everything feels right ♪ 1447 01:27:35,040 --> 01:27:37,459 ♪ - Like wow ♪ ♪ - Everything looks bright ♪ 1448 01:27:37,540 --> 01:27:40,129 All my senses are right. 1449 01:27:40,210 --> 01:27:42,589 ♪ - Like wow ♪ ♪ - Everything feels right ♪ 1450 01:27:42,670 --> 01:27:46,009 ♪ Baby, baby, baby ♪ ♪ the way I'm feeling you ♪ 1451 01:27:46,090 --> 01:27:48,009 ♪ Is like wow ♪ 1452 01:27:48,100 --> 01:27:51,019 ♪ [ INSTRUMENTAL ] ♪ 1453 01:28:08,620 --> 01:28:12,159 ♪ There is something ♪ ♪ that I see ♪ 1454 01:28:12,250 --> 01:28:15,669 ♪ In the way ♪ ♪ you look at me ♪ 1455 01:28:15,750 --> 01:28:19,169 ♪ There's a smile ♪ ♪ There's a truth ♪ 1456 01:28:19,250 --> 01:28:22,669 ♪ In your eyes ♪ 1457 01:28:22,760 --> 01:28:26,089 ♪ What an unexpected way ♪ 1458 01:28:26,180 --> 01:28:29,559 ♪ On this unexpected day ♪ 1459 01:28:29,640 --> 01:28:31,559 ♪ Could it be ♪ 1460 01:28:31,640 --> 01:28:36,559 ♪ This is where I belong ♪ 1461 01:28:36,650 --> 01:28:40,019 ♪ It is you I have loved ♪ 1462 01:28:40,110 --> 01:28:43,109 ♪ All along ♪ 1463 01:28:43,190 --> 01:28:46,909 ♪ There's no more mystery ♪ 1464 01:28:46,990 --> 01:28:50,449 ♪ It is finally clear to me ♪ 1465 01:28:50,530 --> 01:28:54,199 ♪ You're the home ♪ ♪ my heart's searched for ♪ 1466 01:28:54,290 --> 01:28:57,289 ♪ So long ♪ 1467 01:28:57,370 --> 01:29:00,959 ♪ It is you I have loved ♪ 1468 01:29:01,040 --> 01:29:04,969 ♪ All along ♪ 1469 01:29:32,160 --> 01:29:35,999 ♪ Whoa, over and over ♪ 1470 01:29:36,080 --> 01:29:41,169 ♪ I'm filled with emotion ♪ 1471 01:29:41,250 --> 01:29:44,209 ♪ As I look ♪ 1472 01:29:44,300 --> 01:29:48,929 ♪ Into your perfect face ♪